I wanted to kiss her, to hold her and tell her it would all be okay, but I had to get her untied first, and then there was the matter of her brother lying on the ground in a pool of blood.
As soon as her wrists were free, I held them in my hands, rubbing them gently to work the blood back into her hands.
“Josie, talk to me,” I whispered, staring into her frightened eyes. “Are you okay?”
It was a ridiculous question. The blood dripping all over her body told me she definitely wasn’t.
“My chest hurts,” she finally whispered.
Gently reaching out, I trailed my finger along the cut from her collarbone to her navel. She hissed in pain, but luckily, the cut wasn’t deep. It would heal. As for the rest of her…
“Come on,” I whispered, gently picking her up. She whimpered as she wrapped her arms around my neck. I vaguely heard voices behind me, but ignored them, focusing solely on the woman in my arms.
Tucking her head into my neck, I felt her tears slide down my skin, and it nearly broke my heart. How could I have let this happen? How had I ignored all the signs that I couldn’t just walk away?
Archer was at the door, covered in blood, but mostly looked normal. He nodded as I passed, but it was Mav who opened the door to his cruiser and ushered me inside with her.
“Let’s get her to the hospital. Michael has Sawyer and Remi will handle everything here.”
I settled into the back with her on my lap, brushing her hair out of her face, staring at her blood-soaked face. This was all my fault.
I thought I could have it all.
But this proved that I would only get her killed.
I sat by her chair,listening to the beeping of the monitors. She had been out of it for hours, and I thanked God she wasn’t awake to feel any of the pain I had caused.
I’d thought I was doing the right thing when I walked off the job, but the past would always be there to bite me in the ass. I never should have talked to her, or even allowed her into my life in any way.
Yet, as I sat here next to her bed, I couldn’t force myself to walk away like I should.
“How’s she doing?” Archer asked, walking over to the window.
“Still sleeping. Drugged up.”
“She’s alive.”
“No thanks to me,” I muttered, dipping my head in shame. “I never should have walked away from that last job.”
“JR, this was gonna happen at some point.”
I whipped my head in his direction, but he quickly clarified.
“Not this,” he pointed to the bed. “I’m talking about you walking away.”
“You don’t know that,” I sighed, rubbing my hand over my face. “If I had just kept going?—”
“You were fitting in too nicely around here. Even if you weren’t with Josie, you would have grown tired of the job. I’ve seen it before.”
Maybe he was right, but that didn’t make what happened any easier.
“She’s in that bed because of me. Look at her face.”
Even as I said the words, I forced myself to look at her again, to catalog her swollen cheeks, the bruises covering her eyes, and the way her lip split in multiple places. She was hardly recognizable.
“You love her, don’t you?”
The words were like a sword to my chest, reminding me that even if I did, I would only get her killed.
