“You know why.”
“No, what I know is that you think I’m missing something in my life.”
“You are! You were staring at that woman!”
“I was watching,” I corrected. “Just keeping an eye on the neighborhood in case this ex of yours decided to make an appearance.”
She scoffed at me, shaking her head. “Keep telling yourself that.”
“What do you want from me, Alyssa?” I snapped, losing my cool. “Do you want me to run out and find a woman who will treat me like shit the way every single man in your life has?”
To Alyssa’s credit, she didn’t even flinch at my words. “I make some horrible decisions,” she admitted. “But at least I put myself out there. At least I try.”
“That’s fine. Keep trying. Keep getting beaten and raped. How many times is this now?”
No matter how many terrible things I said, Alyssa just stared at me with those accepting eyes. She knew me too well to ever believe I meant a word of what I said. It was the worst of me, and she was the best of what I could be.
Slowly, she stood and walked over to me, her arms slipping around my waist as she rested her head against my chest. For the first time in a long time, she wasn’t hugging me out of desperation. She didn’t cling to me because someone had just used her as a punching bag.
This was a real hug. The kind she used to give me when we were kids, when both of us needed something to cling to.
My hand slipped around her waist, and I pulled her tighter, closing my eyes and remembering for the first time in years whatit was like to have someone truly care about me and want what was best for me.
“I’m sorry,” I sighed, pressing a kiss to her hairline. “I shouldn’t have said those things.”
“It’s okay. It’s not like it wasn’t true.”
“Still…”
“Do me a favor?”
I looked into her eyes, willing to give her anything right now. “Yeah?”
“Try not to think about the past, and only what could happen if you let it.”
That was a big ask, but with her beaten and broken in front of me, still hopeful as ever, I found I couldn’t say no to her.
“I’ll try.”
24
JOSIE
“Hey!”Scarlet preened as she walked out of the bedroom in not much more than a nightie with a silk robe.
Grimacing, I buried my face in my tea and gave a half-hearted hello. God, this was going to kill me. How much more of this could I take?
“Cuddlebug,” Sawyer grinned, walking down the hall toward his finacée. He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her in close as he pecked her with kisses. It was nauseating.
“Gag me,” I muttered under my breath.
Unfortunately, I wasn’t quite as quiet as I hoped for, and Sawyer pulled his attention from the long column of Scarlet’s neck to look at me. “What’s that?”
“Nothing,” I smiled brightly.
“Hey, Josie,” he waved me toward the living room. “Can I talk to you for a minute?”
“Sure.”
