Ruby nodded, a faint smile appearing on her face. “Thanks a million, Sebastian. Seriously, a million, because I have that many reasons to thank you.”
Her fragrance lingered in her office—her hair products, and that something that always made me think of skin warmed by sun. Maybe it was the scent of honeysuckle from her garden. Her cheeks were flushed, and the neckline of her shirt nearly gave me an instant hard-on.
I wanted to close the distance. To pull her out of that chair, pin her to the desk like I normally would, kiss that tensed smile off her face, and make her come until she’d scream my name and neither of us remembered what I said—or why it complicated things.
Instead, I said, “You’re welcome. It’s kind of nice using my skills for something other than finding out why a probe spun off course on the way to Mars. I’ll be in cabin four. Zoom meeting and a backlog of emails.”
“I’ll see you later?” she asked.
“Sure,” I said. I used to know exactly whatsee you latermeant. Now, I wasn’t so sure. Would showing up mean pushing her to decide? Would staying away mean I was giving up?
I was at the door when she called behind me, “Don’t let Sandra corner you too long.”
25
Ruby
OH, GREAT. I COULDN’Tkeep my big mouth shut.
I always said too much and ruined things.
So he’d been talking to Sandra. Again. I happened to see them. Again. So what?
I was mudsliding fast—straight from denying my feelings to fighting them to being downright possessive.
I didn’t want to know what came next. Unless it was me.
It had only been a day, and I was already having withdrawal symptoms. Sebastian was still right here—with his chest and abs and biceps and shoulders and those deep brown eyes and that smooth hair and that smile and scent and care and dry humor. The whole goddamn package.
And I couldn’t let myself touch him. Because I didn’t even know what touching him would mean anymore, or what it would do to me. And ifIdidn’t know, how the hell was he supposed to?
It could only make things worse.
I wanted to scream.
Normally, it would be his name while coming. But right now, I wanted to screamathim.
For changing everything. For taking something simple and making it impossibly complicated.
I wanted to scream atmyself, too, because if I didn’t have feelings for him (ones that would absolutely remain unnamed), then him wanting more wouldn’t have shaken me like this.
Other guys had wanted more from me before. And that had never touched a nerve. I’d either ghosted them without a second thought or had my fun until they got the message.
Maybe tonight, I could Ruby it again. Get it out of my system. That used to be my specialty.
Used to be?
No. Present tense. Get the fuck away, past tense. Thatisstill my expertise.
A knock on my door saved me from going temporarily insane.
Sandra, of all people, came in to finalize the list of upcoming cabin bookings. That was, until she asked about cabin four, pretending not to notice that I’d taken it off the list.
“Sea Glass is closed for bookings until further notice. Will that be all?” I cut her off.
After she left, I busied myself with things that actually needed doing—restocking room supplies, reviewing the maintenance logs, and reassuring various vendors we’d be back to full capacity soon, so they wouldn’t jack up the price for the current smaller order. Anything to keep myself moving and my thoughts out of places they shouldn’t go.
I had lunch alone in my office, a tray from the newly opened Bar & Grill. Then I headed out to see the progresson stripping the moldy upper wing corner and to make sure Dave had everything he needed for the updated plans.
