My head jerks up. I blink, spotting a faint shift where he must be standing.
“Don’t look too surprised, I promised I would be here before the holidays,” Jasper quips from the doorway.
“I wasn’t expecting you until later,” I say, happiness pulling at my mouth. “But I’m glad you’re here, brother.”
“Looking sharp, Seaborn.”
I chuckle. “I’m wearing hospital-issue comfy wear and compression socks while my own clothes are in the wash.”
“Still. You look better than you did when I last visited.”
For a moment, the weight in my chest eases. It feels good to be told Ilookbetter, even if I can’t see it myself.
“Jasper Åkerman, meet Ivy Campbell.” I gesture between them. “Ivy is the one keeping me alive and mostly sane.”
My friend steps deeper into the room, his voice growing a touch more formal. “Nice to meet you. I’m a friend and former teammate.”
“I know who you are, Mr. Highest Scorer in the League for the past three seasons. It’s so lovely to meet you,” Ivy says, her tone a little brighter than usual. It’s subtle, but I catch it. For someone as steady as her, that flicker of excitement over meeting another hockey star is unexpectedly endearing.
“Oh, you’re a hockey fan. That’s an interesting development,” my friend remarks.
“My family has been rooting for the Woodpeckers since the team was formed.”
“Even better. Thanks for taking care of Teddy Boy over there. He’s such a pain in the ass, but we tolerate him on good days,” Jasper teases.
“I’ve noticed.” Ivy walks around the bed, standing closest to it. “Everything looks good. I’ll give you two some time to catch up. Call if you need anything.”
She touches my shoulder gently before leaving. I listen as her steps fade down the hall, then turn to my friend. He speaks before I can.
“Well, look at that. I thought Em was exaggerating when she said you might have the hots for the nurse. Such a cliché.”
“Keep your voice down,” I warn through clenched teeth.
“Or what?”
“I’ll kick your ass the moment I’m out of here.”
“Oh, I’m scared now.” Jasper laughs and drags a chair over. “Joking aside, how are you doing?”
I release a heavy sigh, thinking of how to describe my current mood. “Somewhere between exhausted and numb. I can’t see more than slight differences in light and shadows. My head hurts most of the time. Yet, I’m considered lucky.”
“You’re allowed to be pissed.”
“Believe me, I am.” My fists clench, nails biting into my palms, a physical outlet for the anger boiling beneath the fatigue. “It makes no fucking sense why I’m the one who has to go through this. I keep asking myself, why me? Is it because I was such an asshole before or what?”
Jasper exhales hard, the kind of breath that carries more weight than words. “Don’t do that to yourself, Teddy. You didn’t deserve any of this. No one does. Being cocky on the ice or rough around the edges off it…that’s just you. And we love you for it. This—” His voice dips, tight with emotion, “—this was Farrington being reckless, not some twisted karma cashing in. Stop thinking that.”
I want to believe him, but the doubt clings stubbornly to my insides. “Yeah, maybe. Hard to shut that voice off, though.”
“When I saw the replay…fuck, Teddy. It was brutal. I’ve seen lots of hits, but yours was the hardest thing I’ve ever watched in my life. When Em told me you weren’t waking up—” He lets out a long shaking breath. “I thought we lost you.”
My throat closes up. My eyes sting, wetness threatening as I swallow hard. I don’t want him to hear the crack in my voice, but the thought of how close I came to being dead hits heavier when spoken aloud.
“I thought so too,” I admit quietly. “It still feels like I’m halfway gone some days.”
“You’re not gone, brother. You’re right here, still fighting. That’s what matters. And as long as you’re fighting, we’ve got you. Hear me?”
I nod, leaning into the pillows, emotionally exhausted. It’s time to switch topics. “How long have you been in town?”
