Their pride hits me hard, because these are the people who’ve heard about every stumble and scraped knee, every meltdown and triumph. Hearingthemsay I deserve this makes it real in a way that no stopwatch or qualifying round ever could.
Ezra flags down the server walking past, a woman with space buns and neon eyeliner who gives us a nod of recognition. “Your usual?” she asks.
“Double it.”
As she walks off, Ezra studies me with intensity. “Be honest, Ives. How are you doing besides getting into the Circuit? Is your work treating you well?”
The truth hovers on my tongue, but I bite it back. They already see more than I want them to. “I’m doing very well, thank you very much.”
My friend scoffs theatrically. “And I’m the next starting goalie for the Woodpeckers.”
“You’re a five-foot-nine graphic designer with a bad knee, Ez,” Rio deadpans, which earns him a middle finger.
“How about your new famous patient?” Ezra continues interrogating me. “You never replied to our texts asking if you’re taking care of Teddy.”
The name alone is enough to set off a ripple in my chest.Teddy. I picture him in that hospital room, trying to hide his frustration behind jokes. Guilt creeps in because I shouldn’t be thinking about him, especially outside of my shifts. Still, the thought of him being alone while I’m out here laughing and having fun with my friends makes me ache.
Maybe it’s time to acknowledge that my steps are lighter every time I walk into his room, looking forward to his voice and presence. I’m not stupid; I know the difference between empathy and whatever else is blooming underneath it. Butifit is something more, I’m not ready to name it.
My fingers tighten around the laminated drink list. “I can’t discuss work. Same rules as always.”
Amber narrows her eyes at me, reading me the way close friends do. “Wait. What was that face you just made?”
Shit. I feel the muscles in my face betray me. It’s the look I get when someone mentions something I don’t want to admit out loud. No amount of pretending to study the cocktail menu is going to hide it from Amber’s laser focus.
“I did not,” I insist, though the heat crawling up my neck gives me away.
“You totally did,” Nevaeh says, her grin sly. “You’ve got something to share, don’t you?”
“No,” I reply firmly, forcing my voice steady. “There’s nothing.”
Liar, my mind whispers. But they don’t need to know that seeing Teddy has become the best part of my work day.
The table exchanges looks, unconvinced, but mercifully they let it drop. Relief floods me, but the topic lingers like smoke in the back of my mind. We fall into a silence only people who’veknown each other before braces and basement parties can share.
The server returns and sets two tall glasses down with a wink. I raise one in answer, taking a long gulp. The taste is comforting; sweet with a citrus twist lingering on the tongue. Warmth spreads in my chest, chasing away the chill.
“From what we’ve gathered, you’ve been running yourself ragged,” Amber says gently. “Work, training, getting ready for the Circuit…do you ever stop?”
I roll the cocktail glass between my palms. “Not really. Between double shifts and qualifying, I barely have time to sleep. Making it here tonight is a miracle.”
“You need a life outside of both,” Nevaeh chimes in. “When was the last time you went on a date?”
Heat creeps up my neck at the topic. “Over two years ago. And honestly, I don’t have the time or energy for it. The last thing I need is another broken fuckboy who thinks my job as a nurse is a kink and my schedule is flexible.”
That earns a round of laughter from the table, but Rio shakes his head knowingly. “You deserve more than crumbs, Ives.”
The words settle under my skin, warm and cutting all at once. Because he’s right. I really do. I have to remember how the last time I tried dating, it nearly wrecked me. My last cautionary tale came into my life with charm and sad eyes two and half years ago. At first, I told myself that he’d get back on his feet with time and my affection. Somewhere along the way, his chaos became my responsibility, sucking all my energy. I learned that you can hold someone together for a while, but you can’t step into a storm just to keep them dry.
I take another sip and let the burn chase away unnecessary memories before they can dig in too deep. A guitarist starts tuning onstage, lights flickering overhead. Nevaeh bumps my arm. “All of this comes from a place of love. We want you to be happy, Ives. You’re just working and training so hard.”
“I appreciate the concern and love you all, too,” I say sincerely.
“Love you,” Amber clinks her glass to mine. “No more talk about complicated stuff. Only banter between friends and Ezra finally confessing he’s in love with the pink-haired woman from work he kissed at the office holiday party a few weeks ago.”
“Hey!” he protests. “What I told you about her was after all the tequila shots. You can’t hold it against me.”
We dissolve into laughter, real and unfiltered. For the next few hours, we get drunk on freedom and cheap cocktails, demolishing bowls of chili popcorn while listening to live music and chatting. I throw my head back laughing at Rio’s stupid jokes, sing off-key with Amber, and clap when Ezra pretends to drum on the table. It feels like we’re twenty-one again, reckless and invincible.
