It was the sounds of laughter.
She tilted her head and turned to follow the laughter, finding its source down the street. There were three young women about her age, dressed to suggest that they were common, but enjoying themselves like she could not believe. They laughed at one another, they skipped and jumped, and one of them pushed the other off the sidewalk and into a mud puddle. This had the girls shrieking, and then they fell about themselves with glee.
“Sophia!” her mother called to her. “Quickly, dear. Do not dally!”
Sophia eyed the girls a moment longer.
She could not say why those girls fascinated her so much. She could not say what it was about them that she yearned after.But there was something about them just now, how freely they behaved, how much fun they were having, that made Sophia hunger for what she was missing.
And not just what she was missing, but what she would never have herself.
CHAPTER 2
“Slower… slower… do not rush…”
Sophia could hear her mother’s silent commands as if she was speaking them directly into her ear.
“Do not flourish, do not excite, let the music do the work for you…”
Sophia glanced quickly to her side, taking note of her mother who watched on in silence. But even in that silence, she could see the look in her mother’s eyes, the warning they held to concentrate and not to get ahead of herself.
It was when their eyes met that her mother widened her own, a warning to pay attention. Sophia snapped her attention back to the task at hand: playing the pianoforte as if her life depended on it.
In many ways it does. After all, is this not what I have been practicing for? Is this not the entire purpose of all the hard work I have put in? If not for this, then for what?
Although her parents often said that perfection did not exist, and the most that one could hope for was to touch perfection if only for a moment, Sophia admitted silently to herself that the way she played was indeed the very thing that she strode for: perfection like never before.
She was seated at the pianoforte, her back was straight, her shoulders were square, her chin was parallel with the floor, and her fingers sang as they danced across the ivory keys. Behind her sat two dozen spectators, and each to the last listened on in rapture.
Sophia was careful not to smile as she played. She was sure not to become lost in the music. She knew this song as if she had written it, but her eyes stayed fixed on the sheet of music, as if it were a leash used to tether her in place.
And when she was finished, striking the final note…
“Bravo!” a voice declared.
“Well done!”
“Masterful!”
The room broke into applause for her performance, and many people cheered as if it was the most wonderful piece of music they had ever heard. Sophia, expecting this reaction, turned and offered a grateful smile for the room. But it was a smile that was soft, not at all abrasive, and humble to its very core.
“She plays so well,” a gentleman at the front noted to the woman he was seated by.
“I have never heard its equal,” she heard a woman comment from somewhere among the audience.
“I wish I could play half as well,” another voice chortled.
Sophia found her mother, who did not smile with pride, but nodded once with acceptance. Sophia was to play again at the end of the day, but this first performance was exactly what they had been working toward. Even better, Sophia had been able to control herself, at no point allowing her passion or zest to take over.
“Sophia, dear…” Her mother was gesturing for her to move away from the pianoforte.
“Oh, yes…” Sophia smiled once more and stepped around the small crowd.
The small gathering was in the main hall, the manor itself belonging to a friend of Sophia’s mother. Sophia knew most who were there, but there were plenty of faces she did not recognizeon sight. They were all older than she was, all lords and ladies of high reputation. As she stepped away from the pianoforte, many smiled in appraisement.
She moved around the edges of the crowd, her first thought to approach her mother and sister. There, she would sit and listen as others performed, while her mother would be sure to point out faults in their performance, or highlight things that Sophia needed to do.
However, it was as she shuffled around the back of the guests, that Sophia heard something which gave her pause. Worse than that, she nearly tripped over herself in outright surprise.
