“Nothing… everything.” She turns to face me better, dislodging my touch. “You say you want us to try again. You’re talking about making love, which sounds like you want a future. But you’re not settled in your life. You’re still a man on tour with no home base, no sense of home, and I want that in a partner. Ineedthat. I need someone responsible.”
I blink. “Responsible. Like you were last night? Drunk at a bar, lucky your brother-in-law was there or that you happened to drunk text me?”
Her cheeks pinken in embarrassment, which is the last thing I want her to feel. “Tara, listen to me. The past ten months, I’ve been working nonstop in the studio with the guys. I needed to cement my place in the band. To become an integral part of them. That’s where my focus has been. Not on decorating a house I’m barely in.”
She wraps her arms around herself. “And it doesn’t matter anyway because your next step is to go on tour, right? So mayberesponsiblewas the wrong word, butstableis not.” She draws a deep breath and lets it out again. “Ever since I lost my dad… suddenly… my life has been one major change after another.”
“Tara—”
She shakes her head. “Let me finish, please?”
I nod. “Go on.”
“I thought I’d go to school in New York, come home to California, and take over Dad’s practice. There were other vetsthere to keep the business running until I got my degree, but Mom wanted to start over somewhere new. So New York became home, she remarried, and I had stepsiblings. I’ve just begun to settle in.”
She pauses in thought, and I wait her out this time, knowing she isn’t finished and needs to explain.
She rubs her eyes with her palms before pulling herself together again, straightening her shoulders and meeting my gaze. “Look, I told myself if I got involved with anyone, it would be someone who wants the same things I do.”
I grasp one of her hands and hold on so she can’t pull away. “And what is that?”
“A house and a family of my own. Someone I can count on, who will be there.”
Because she lost her father, she equates stability with the idea of a traditional family, I think. But it didn’t have to be that way.
“Look at Dash and Cassidy. They’re going to make it work when he goes on tour. Plenty of famous musicians have families and a home base. Just because I don’t have one yet doesn’t mean I don’t want the same things you do.” And I only want them with her.
Is it fast? Yeah. Is it crazy? Probably. Do I care? Fuck no.
Though she is listening, I know she isn’t processing my words. “We don’t need to move so quickly. Let’s keep getting to know each other, okay?” I tug on her hand. “Let me take you out again. No pressure for anything more.”
Obviously between our deep connection in bed and my ridiculous empty rental, she’s gotten scared and is pulling back. I can’t change my career, nor do I want to. I also don’t believe she’d ask that of me. I need to be part of her life so I can show her we can have the future she wants. Even if my touring means our way of going about it is untraditional.
“So what do you say?” I ask in the wake of her silence. “We can go on another date sometime this week?”
“Yeah, okay.” She bites down on her lower lip. “But I think I should go now.”
I take the win where I can. “Okay.” Leaning over, I press a kiss to her lips and then stand up to get dressed and take her home.
CHAPTER SEVEN
Axel
After I driveTara home, I return to my house, more aware of the empty living, dining, and family rooms. As I walk toward my bedroom, Tara’s words echo in my head.
You’re not settled in your life. You’re still a man on tour with no home base, no sense of home, and I want that in a partner. I need that. I need someone responsible.
I’m forced to admit the truth stings, and I can’t sort through my thoughts on my own. I need to talk to someone who knows me well, and nobody understands me better than Cassidy. I shower, eat breakfast, and call my sister. Despite it being a Sunday, she’s at Sasha and Xander’s, going over work, and I head there for a visit.
Sasha lets me in and greets me with a welcoming hug. The famous actress never ceases to amaze me with how much she looks like the girl next door when not in full makeup. She is exceptionally pretty in her California blonde way, and I know how much Xander loves her.
She leads me into the kitchen, where the women have been working, my buddy Bella included.
I kiss my sister on the cheek and give the dog a pat on the head. “Miss me, girl?”
“We just saw you last night,” Cassidy says, laughing. “But if your best friend didn’t miss you, don’t worry. I did.”
I roll my eyes. “Fine. Make fun of me. I’m used to it.”
