But that was bull. Life was just as complicated back then, and her mother had already told her the truth. You can’t change the past, you can only change the future.
She stripped off her clothes and put on the wedding dress, staring at her reflection in the mirror, squinting, trying to see Tallulah looking back But it wasn’t her long-dead aunt, and it wasn’t the familiar Susan, either. The woman in the mirror was different Softer, sadder, more human. She looked vulnerable, Susan thought Like a woman in love.
She blinked again, but the minor didn’t waver. Outside she heard a car drive into the driveway, but she didn’t move. She’d lost the will to do anything but stand there, staring.
“You look gorgeous, darling.” Edward’s voice was like a glass of ice water thrown in her face. She whirled around, feeling her face turn pale with shock and then red with shame.
“I didn’t hear you come in! Edward, you shouldn’t be here...”
“Don’t be silly, Susan. I don’t believe in any superstitious garbage about not seeing the bride before the ceremony. We make our own luck And I must say that’s a spectacular dress. Mother’s livid about her dress, of course, but I’ve managed to calm her down. Looking at you now, I’m glad her dress ripped.”
Susan stared at him numbly. “Edward...”
“Yes, love?”
“I can’t many you.”
His Teflon smile faded slightly, and his perfect brow wrinkled slightly. “Bridal nerves, darling? I’m sure they’ll pass.”
She’d almost forgotten how impervious Edward was to subtleties. “I don’t love you, Edward.”
“I know that,” he said with an expansive smile. “I don’t love you, either. But we’ll make a marvelous pair. We’re perfectly suited to each other—haven’t I always told you that?”
He had, indeed. He’d even managed to convince her of it for long enough to get her into this mess.
“You don’t understand. I spent last night with someone else. In bed with someone else. Making love with someone else.”
His smile faded, but only slightly. “I can guess who it was. That friend of your mother’s, isn’t it? The romantic one from the jungle. The one with the impossible name. Surely you’re not thinking of marrying him, are you? He’s hardly your type.”
“Who is my type?”
“I am, darling, and you know it Listen, I’m prepared to be magnanimous about this. After all, you’re only human, prey to the same hormonal urges as most people. I certainly won’t condemn you for being tempted. After all, you’re under a lot of stress.”
“Aren’t you prey to hormonal urges?” she asked, curious.
He shrugged. “I’m good at sublimating them. There are a great many things more interesting than sex when it comes right down to it I thought we were agreed on that.”
“You don’t want to have sex with me?”
Edward sighed, a long-suffering sound. “We’ll have wonderful, energetic sex, dear one. I’ve been told I’m very adept And we’ll have children if you want I have no objections, as long as we can find proper help. And if our marriage ends up as more of a friendship than anything else, then we might count ourselves blessed.”
“And what if I’m tempted again? Fall prey to my hormonal urges?” She was staring at him in complete fascination. She’d always thought Jake Wyczynski was an exotic creature. He was absolutely normal compared to the man she was supposed to marry.
He smiled sweetly. “I know I can count on you to be discreet.”
She walked toward him, slowly, and placed her hands on his broad, perfect shoulders. “No, Edward,” she said gently. She brushed a sweet kiss against his perfectly shaven cheek. “I won’t marry you.”
For a moment doubt clouded his fine eyes. And then he shrugged, undeterred. “I’ll be waiting for you at the church, Susan. You’ll come to your senses. I know you will. What in heaven’s name do you think that man has to offer you? A life of roughing it, living out of your suitcase like some gypsy?”
“Goodbye, Edward.”
For a moment bis perfect features darkened, and she remembered Neddie Marsden’s dangerous rage. But that was another time, another man, another life. Chances were it was only a dream.
“You’re making a huge mistake, Susan.”
“Goodbye, Edward.”
And then she was alone, in her mother’s house, in her aunt’s wedding gown. More alone than she’d ever been in her long, lonely life.
