“Everything, even oysters?” asked Craig seemingly fascinated.
“Yup.” Steph smiled at the fairer and slightly younger looking Jon.
“Shame, oysters are a fantastic aphrodisiac you know,” he said seriously making her laugh.
“Craig, I can guarantee that me being violently sick or going into anaphylactic shock is the complete opposite of an aphrodisiac.” She smiled at him.
“I dunno, I reckon you could carry off being blue.” He laughed at her, lightening the mood briefly.
“Steph, what do your parents do for a living?” asked Alexandria giving a very quick and unexpected change to conversation.
“My dad is a builder and my mum died about six years ago,” she replied honestly.
“Sorry,” said Alexandria sincerely.
“It’s fine.” Steph offered a small smile, not wanting the other woman to feel awkward.
“She must have been quite young, and you,” said Eugene sympathetically.
“I suppose, I was nineteen at the time,” said Steph hoping that this particular topic would change sooner rather than later.
“Was it an accident?” asked Alexandria seriously.
“No, cancer. She’d had it for most of my life to some degree and as time went on the doctors just kept finding more and more until I think she had it just about everywhere,” said Steph sadly.
“Sorry,” said Alexandria again before Jon saved her.
“Maybe we should toast the next generation of Brooker offspring?”
“Yes, let’s,” agreed Cameron holding a glass aloft.
Robert, the middle grandchild, who was probably only eight or nine suddenly asked, “Granddad, if you and Lucy are having a baby what will I be? Will it be my cousin?”
“Not a cousin, Robert, the baby will actually be your uncle or auntie,” explained Cameron.
“Wow! That’s kind of cool isn’t it?” Grinned Robert.
“Half uncle or auntie,” retorted Alexandria who was rewarded with dark glances from her father, husband and both brothers.
Steph smiled to herself thinking that even she didn’t irritate so many people at any one time.
“Alex, you really need to be more Christian in your outlook,” said Jon staring at his sister coldly.
“Quite,” agreed her husband who Steph had just remembered was a vicar.
Steph smiled to herself again wondering why Eugene was collarless and whether he wore it around the house or just when he was working. She then had to stifle a giggle as she wondered whether he ever wore it in the bedroom, how kinky would that be?
She looked up and realised Alex, as Jon had called her was staring at her waiting.
“Sorry,” said Steph hoping for an indication of what was expected of her.
“I was just asking if you liked babies?” asked Eugene.
“Oh, I suppose,” said Steph nervously and then attempting to lighten the mood she added, “But I couldn’t eat a whole one.” She cringed as she saw the expressions of her dinner companions around her realising that she had uttered the sort of cheesy line more fitting of her dad. The sensible thing for her to do now would be to stay silent, but never one to do the sensible thing, Steph ploughed on and now said directly to Eugene, “Although obviously I don’t advocate the eating of our young, but I believe your fellow clergy members did.”
Eugene stared at her disbelievingly as Jon turned to look down at her next to him and said smiling, “Darling, if you havehard evidence to back up your claim that the Church of England has covered up their clergy eating babies you would have an unmissable opportunity for blackmail.”
Steph smiled back at him before returning her attention to Eugene and said, “Not in modern times, obviously, but probably medieval times, I think it was widely known and accepted,” she rambled on.
