Jon stretched up to rub his fingers across her cheek making her flinch as if she had been scolded by his touch. He withdrew his hand and answered her question.
“Penny. My wife’s name is Penny.”
“What? She can’t be. You told me Lucy was your wife?” cried Steph.
“No, darling, I didn’t,” he protested and went on to explain further. “You had a conversation with Lindsay and made an assumption. I never ever said I was married to Lucy, although I did allow you to believe that I was. In my defence you were as responsible for the whole married to Lucy thing as I was and you seemed to imply that you didn’t want to get into a proper, serious relationship, but I wanted to be with you and was willing to take you on any terms. Then one night, the night you got drunk with Lindsay, we talked, well, you talked and admitted that you didn’t want to share me and certainly from that point I have tried to tell you,” he insisted.
“I don’t believe this and I don’t believe you. This is ridiculous,” she said quietly and sadly.
“But this is good, darling, we can be together properly . . .”
“You are clinically insane; you have to be to think that there is anything good in this. I thought you were married to Lucy, pregnant Lucy, and that made me see that I can’t do the mistress thing. So, Penny, she’s welcome to you. She can have you, all of you because I am done with sharing and if she is stupid, greedy or desperate enough to let you have your cake and eat it, then she is as mad as you and she deserves all she gets.”
“You know nothing about Penny so you can keep the fucking judgemental, barbed comments to yourself,” he roared, anger coursing through every fibre of his body.
“Why? Why the fuck should I?” Steph asked, moving closer so that she was literally standing toe to toe with Jon, almost daring him to push her to really unleash her anger on him and Penny.
“She doesn’t deserve this, none of it.” He sighed with sadness etched across his face and what looked like the genuine threat of tears in his eyes.
Steph’s heart lurched. She wanted to make this right and yet she knew she couldn’t, maybe even if she could, she shouldn’t. Jon was married and clearly cared for Penny, his defence of her proved that, meaning no matter how much he loved Steph, his wife would always come first.
“I don’t deserve this either,” she whispered. “I love you and have been so miserable to think of you with Lucy and now I am supposed to just forget about the fact that you have systematically lied to me since we first met and simply plod on, substituting a Lucy for a Penny? There was a time when I thought this, us, was far more than I deserved, but being with you taught me that I had some worth and now I know that I deserve so much more.” She cried as she moved away from Jon. “Bye Mr Brooker, thank you for inviting me tonight, it was most enlightening and I will see you in the office tomorrow.” Opening the door she was greeted by the sight of Lucy and an older version of Jon who she now assumed was his dad.
“Oh hi, I’m Lucy, you must be Steph, we’ve heard lots about you, haven’t we, Cam?” she said to the man’s nod. “Although we have met before haven’t we? At the office when Jon was being frightful to you.”
“He is a dreadful bully at work if things aren’t going well, aren’t you, son?” asked the older man.”
Steph stared at them both as Jon appeared at her side and placed his arm around her waist, his hand on her hip, ignoring her bristling beneath his touch.
“Steph, my dad, Cameron Brooker and his wife Lucy. This is Steph, my girlfriend,” he said confidently.
“Lovely to meet you and it may be an old fashioned concept, but you really do bring out the best in my son, he can’t stop raving about you,” said Cameron before Lucy gave him a nudge.
“I believe you’re going to help SuLyn with her research funding?” asked Lucy.
“Yes, apparently so, but I think she may have been better off with you,” said Steph.
“Not without me potentially compromising my own charity fundraising and we already donate to her.” Lucy smiled.
“Shall we get back?” asked Jon suddenly making Steph reorder her thoughts, making her feel angry again that he thought this was ever going to end well.
She turned to look at him and realised that he thought this was somehow resolved now and it wasn’t. She was hurt and angry and had no desire to be with anyone who could lie to her so well.
“No. I am going home, alone. Very nice to have met you both Mr and Mrs Brooker, but Jon wasn’t entirely honest when he said I was his girlfriend. I am actually his ex-girlfriend because I have known enough liars to know that I have no desire to be saddled with another one, especially not with one that I love because that just let’s him hurt me even more.”
She stormed across the foyer and despite Jon’s frantic cries following her she got into the back of a cab and managed to give the driver her address before changing her mind, then burst out crying.
As Steph pressed the intercom,she knew how ridiculous she looked in a formal evening gown trying to gain entry to a hospital ward at ten p.m. The nurse who replied was stern and probably very busy and was certainly not going to let Steph, or anyone else onto the ward despite her crying protests.
“I am sorry, but visiting time is over, come back tomorrow,” she said and that was the end of the conversation.
Steph muttered to herself but thought that it was probably for the best that she had not seen her dad in her current state, but she had nowhere else to go. She couldn’t go home becauseJon had a key, he knew where her family home was, and Eddie’s, and Steph didn’t want to descend on her other brother’s or sister’s homes, although Jess would be the best option if she found nowhere else to go tonight. Normally Lindsay would be her first port of call, but Charlie was Jon’s best friend and he may check for her there.
“Shit!” she said as she slumped in the chair of the communal area and wondered what time Brooker’s building opened because she had a shower room, toiletries and a change of clothes in her office and although Jon would certainly find her there, it was a safe place with all of those people around.
“Stevie?” called a voice behind her.
She stood and turned to find Chris in scrubs looking at her concerned.
