“There’s something I need to tell you…” As his voice trails off, he moves his remaining pasta around the bowl.
“Is this something to do with my dad?”
We haven’t actually discussed my dad’s visit to him.
“No, not at all. I think we may have reached an understanding of sorts.”
I nod, believing what he says. “If not that, then what?”
“I told you about Amber and our wedding that never was.” He takes a slug of his wine and with a long exhale prepares to continue. “There was more to it than that. Afterwards, she disappeared, not even Audrey knew where she was. She offered no explanation to any of us as to why she had changed her mind about getting married.” Dec laughs. “I didn’t even want to get married, not really. It wasn’t something I wanted or needed and with how many marriages I’d seen fail, I knew there were no guarantees of a happy ending.”
“She, Amber did?”
“Yup! I don’t know why. Maybe because her friends were all getting married.”
I scowl. “You must have had feelings, both of you.”
“Of course. We were a good match, well, I thought we were, and we did love each other, but maybe we were in love with the idea of being in love a little more.”
I watch on silently as he pushes his hands through his hair.
“I went off the rails a little bit and was beginning to get my man whore reputation and needed some focus. Mase suggested as I was spending so much time in clubs, I should run one. He invested and it got me back on track. About eighteen months after the wedding day, Amber came back.”
“Just like that?”
“Yup, just like that. Completely out of the blue and with no warning. She tried to talk, wanted to explain, but it all sounded like excuses and bullshit to me. I was done the second she jilted me without so much as a backwards look.”
I’m not entirely surprised by the bitterness and hard edge to Dec’s voice, and yet, it unnerves me slightly.
“Mase and my parents were concerned by her reappearance and the effect it was having on me, so, my dad decided to look into where Amber had been as that was a subject she absolutely refused to be drawn on, suspiciously so.”
“Dec, what is it your dad does?” While I was sure this probably wasn’t where my attention should be drawn, I couldn’t help it. Between how enigmatic Jimmy seemed to be, the references to him tagging Liv with implants and the sense of mystery that shrouded him and his ‘work’, I was intrigued.
Dec chuckled, pulling my hand to his lips where he kissed my knuckles. “I could tell you, but then he’d have to kill you.”
“Oh.”
He laughs again at my single word response and continues with his story. “Dad found out where she’d been, somewhere near Manchester, and while she was there, she had a baby.”
Silence hangs between us for long, heavy seconds.
“Yours?”
He nods sadly.
“You have a child with her?”
I can feel fight or flight instinct kicking in. He had a child. A child I have never even heard him mention. Nobody has mentioned this child, ever. I can’t believe Liv wouldn’t have mentioned this to me.
“No!” he protests and then corrects himself. “I mean, yes, kind of.”
“Dec, I don’t understand.”
“Sorry, I’m not being clear.” His voice breaks and I can see tears beginning to shine in his eyes.
This is hard for him, and that fact makes me strangely happy and honoured that he is choosing to share this with me. I wait expectantly, anticipating the word abortion or termination to follow.
“The baby, my daughter, was adopted.”
