She shakes her head. “No, you need to be more like you and as for you being an option…” She releases a long exhale. “Never. Don’t let anyone use you, not ever. I have been there.” She takes a deep breath and I know she means her abusive stepfather.
I am about to speak, to offer her words of comfort, but she waves it away and continues.
“I know, I had no choice in the matter, and I was a child, yada yada, but I have been there and the feelings of being powerless and worthless are the worst.”
I nod and feel several tears hot on my cheeks.
“You sure you want to go home?”
“Yeah, I think I need to take some time away from Dec, or at least show him that he made a mistake in not telling me who that woman was.”
She stares at me.
“What?”
“Nothing, just…look, he should have told you who she was tonight, but you know, whoever she is, there will be other people and I don’t know that you, or any of us, have the right to know everything about everyone if it’s the past and not important to the future.”
She’s right and I absolutely agree with her. I don’t want to know everything. I would probably be scarred if I did with Dec’s past.
She shrugs and rolls her eyes making me smile.
“I don’t want to know everything and everyone, maybe just the things and people who will make him lie when confronted by them.”
“Sounds fair.”
“What?” I ask again, seeing an expression cross her face that suggests she has more to say.
“That has to cut both ways, like Christian.”
“Christian doesn’t impact on my present or future, well, he didn’t until he turned out to be related to the Hardings.”
“Exactly,” Liv says with a knowing glimmer in her eyes that suggests she knows there’s more to me and Christian than I have let on. “I’m always here to talk to and to listen.”
“I know.” An emotional wobble enters my voice because as much as I would like to share with my sister, I can’t because she will then be conflicted as to where her loyalties lie. “But you’re a Harding, too, and I wouldn’t ever want to put you in a position of needing to lie or at least keep secrets from Mase.”
“I know.” She looks conflicted already and I haven’t even told her anything yet which proves to me that I shouldn’t. “You’re sure about going home?” she asks, our conversation having come full circle.
“Absolutely.”
When we pull up outside my parent’s house, I hesitate.
“There’s still time for us to head back to mine.”
I laugh. “No, I just know Dad will say something or give me knowing looks.”
Liv is already out of the car and opening my door. “Come on, then, let’s do this together.”
As she hits the remote locking button, she is already pulling me towards the house.
With the front door closing behind us, she calls out as my nerves begin to kick in, desperately trying to find an explanation for my return home so early, possibly even at all tonight and definitely minus Dec.
“Hi.”
We enter the lounge and find my parents sat in front of the TV. They both turn and while my mum frowns, Dad seems to be searching behind us.
“Just the two of you?” I think that’s his tactful way of asking where Dec is. His expression changes to one of suspicion.
Here we go.
