The little boy laughed as he looked up at two sets of adoring eyes and splashed even more.
“Have I upset you bringing that up?” Lizzie sounded concerned, and why wouldn’t she? Tasha couldn’t disagree with anything she’d said about her reaction to finding herself unexpectedly pregnant, however she was more concerned by her stepdaughter’s questioning because she suspected there was far more to it than simple curiosity.
“No, not really. Let's get Connor, dried and ready for bed and I will see if I can explain, then maybe you will tell me whatever is on your mind instead of playing twenty questions, okay?”
“Jeez, Philip is right, you really are good at smelling a rat.” Lizzie thought she'd been discreet and clever in her conversation up until that point, maybe not.
Lizzie had attempted to put a nappy on Connor, and failed dismally, but it had been amusing if nothing else. His sleepsuit had gone on much easier before Lizzie sat on the stool at Tasha's feet as she began to feed her son and prepared what she was going to say to Lizzie.
“Okay,” began Tasha. “I had no clue I was pregnant. Didn't think I could be because as far as I was concerned, I was protected. I had the contraceptive implant put in before I moved out here and it had proven good up until Connor.” She gently rocked her son. “It was a few weeks after I married your dad that I felt a little out of sorts and thought I had at worst a urine infection so went to see Dr Marshall thinking he would give me a course of antibiotics, if that. He ran a few checks and tested my urine, I thought for infection, but he confirmed I was pregnant. I was knocked off my feet with that news. I had no idea how it had happened or how I was going to tell your dad. I didn't know if I was ready to be a parent and even with a positive test result I kept telling myself that it could still be wrong and I may not be pregnant.”
Lizzie looked up at her and laughed with a shake of her head.
“I know, pretty stupid, but it's where I was at. Denial isn’t only a river in Egypt,” she muttered with a wry smile. Lizzie offered a short laugh but waited for Tasha to continue. “I also had no idea how your dad would feel about us having a baby. We’d talked about it, in principal and he was kind of easy either way, allowing me to decide if we had children as he already had you and Philip, but I knew he’d have wanted to be involved with the decision making and with a positive pregnancy test there was no decision to make. I was also a little nervous that he might think I’d somehow done it on purpose. He knew something was wrong within minutes of coming home and I hysterically told him I was pregnant, that I didn't want to be and was unsure if I could do it.”
“Really? You considered not having him?” Lizzie reached up to stroke her baby brother's back, clearly surprised and sad at the prospect of him not being there.
“No,” cried Tasha. “Not really. I was shocked and scared, unsure what a baby would mean for me, my new marriage and my career, and all of that on top of my own skewed upbringing. Your dad was happy about it, once over the shock, which took him about seven seconds. I think it did something to boost his overinflated male ego, knocking me up without even trying.” She laughed recalling the thrilled expression on Jim's face then laughed louder at Lizzie’s expression of distaste. “He talked calmly and sensibly about how things would change and apart from my work none seemed to be too huge and none seemed to bother him. He had an answer or a solution to any question or concern I had.”
“Daddy really does have an answer to everything. No problem is too big for him to solve, is it?” Lizzie beamed with pride and total belief in her father’s ability as a problem solver, not that Tasha could deny it. Her nod confirmed what her stepdaughter was saying.
“I never considered not having Connor, not really, except I did once say I couldn't have a baby which is when your dad pointed out that the decision over that had been taken out of my hands. It still took a few months to really get my head around it, but once I saw him on the scan and he began to move I was pretty sold on having a baby.” She laughed. “Although I was knocked off my feet at just how much love I felt for Connor once he was born. So, how about you tell me what this is all about?” She swapped sides with Connor, giving Lizzie a few seconds to prepare what she needed to say.
“It's not me. You know I'm using condoms and Dylan nor I want a baby, not for a long time. It's Danielle, she's pregnant.”
“Bloody hell, Lizzie.” Tasha couldn’t hide her shock, surprise, whichever it was. The young girl who was the same age as Lizzie and a regular visitor to their home was pregnant. “Wasn't she seeing Rory?” Tasha was sure she’d been seeing the half-English boy who’d seen her in pantomime a few years before.
“Mmm, except he went to England a couple of months ago and hooked up with a girl out there so Danielle kind of had revenge sex with a boy over here.”
“Shit!” cried Tasha, startling Connor for a second before getting chastised by Jim who was passing by.
“Baby, please lose the mouth.” He stuck his head around the door briefly. “As usual I am chilled to the bone at the sight of you two colluding.” He entered the room with a frown, looking between his wife and daughter then down to his son who was contentedly feeding and falling asleep. “Looks like Juan is staying over with his folks so Philip's joining us for the whole night.”
“He doesn't like being home alone.” Tasha looked at her husband with sad eyes as she recalled the night in Philip's kitchen with Mickie.
“Hey, it's over, honey.” Having sensed or maybe pre-empted her thoughts he took the few strides until he was next to her. He bent down to kiss her, then his son and finally Lizzie. “I'll see you two downstairs in a little while.”
The two women waited until Jim had gone then Tasha turned her attention back to Danielle. “Right, so Danielle had revenge sex with a boy, who? Do I know him?” Tasha asked and breathed a huge sigh of relief when Lizzie shook her head meaning it hadn't been Dan who had been rather taken with Lizzie's friend.
“A guy from school, we went to a party and he was there, but he's a bit of a deadbeat really, he was just—”
“Available? Willing?” prompted Tasha.
“Yeah. She's really scared, Tash, and doesn't know what to do or say, so I said I'd speak to you.” Lizzie smiled proudly, seeming to expect Tasha to wave a magic wand of sorts.
A long, low breath of uncertainty escaped Tasha’s lips. “What do you expect me to do, Lizzie? I can talk to her about what it's like having a baby, but it was different for me. I was married and your dad was there to take care of us both. Does her mother know?” Tasha asked thinking about Deanna whom she still disliked.
“Uh-ho.” Lizzie threw in a serious shake of the head. “I wondered if Danielle could tell her here with me, and you,” Lizzie announced in an almost singing voice.
“You did, did you? I dunno Lizzie.” She was desperate to simply say no, to dismiss if not veto the idea completely but looking at Lizzie’s concern for her friend she could feel her objections waning. “Deanna and I aren't exactly friends and I would need to check with your dad—”
“If Daddy agrees, will you, please?”
“How do I end up in the middle of these things?” Tasha asked herself as she burped her almost sleeping baby.
“Because you are the best. I'm sure Daddy will agree especially when he thinks how cool it is that I'm not saying I'm pregnant.” Lizzie giggled the last two words as Philip joined them and looked mortified having only heard the final words his sister had uttered.
“What? Lizzie!” he screeched, startling Connor making him cry out. Frowning apologetically, Philip continued in a whisper, “Dad is going to go ape and he will kill Dylan, not even Tasha will stop him and Mom and oh my God, what about Lenny? He might throw you out—”
