Jim nodded suspiciously.
“Apart from the fact that they gave me the creeps, I felt sick to think that he believed I had enjoyed any part of being with him. When he thought I was holding out for more time with him, that I was a dirty bitch was when I fully realised just how much I hated having ever been with him. How much I hated myself for being party to it and I also realised, for possibly the first time that I was a victim in it all.” Her admission was followed by another bite of her burger while she attempted to avoid crying the unshed tears she was storing.
“You were a child, Tasha, and put in an impossible position by the person that should have looked after you most, not used you as currency.”
She nodded. “I’d never seen that before, not really and something your mum said made me start to think about it,” she revealed.
“My mom?”
“Yeah, that day at the vineyard she asked me about my name and I said that I am only usually Natasha when you’re teasing me or if I am in trouble. Immediately she asked what my parents called me. I said that my mum calls me Tasha and Natasha and my dad usually calls me Natasha and she informed me that I have the look that she has only ever seen in neglected and abused children when I talk about my parents.”
“Jeez! Was that before or after she told you about Amanda?”
“Before, I think, it all blurred into one,” she replied honestly.
“She said something to me after you flew back here; I was texting you when I was there with my brother and sisters and she said something cryptic about giving people time and space to recover from their pasts in order to make a future. At least I know what she meant now.”
“You already know about me Jim and I hope you don’t change the way you are towards me because of what you know. I know it’s all fucked-up, but it’s done and it was what it was, but I know it was wrong and it’s over.”
“I wouldn’t dream of changing the way I am towards you, so that ‘fucked-up’ will cost you later.” He grinned.
She laughed, pushing her plate away.
“What sort of dress am I looking for today?” she asked, deliberately changing the subject.
“An evening gown, something sexy, but not too obvious. Something that will allow for underwear.”
“Ease of access?” she teased.
Jim laughed at her. “Not for on the red carpet, baby, but as you know I am more than happy to rip your clothes off in private.”
“Let’s go then.” She nodded, getting to her feet.
Tasha had tried on five dresses and none were quite right; she’d tried strapless, sleeved, full length, short, with a split, full skirt, and although some had been quite nice, none were right. The sales assistant appeared as Tasha stood in a full length, strapless dress that was struggling to contain her breasts.
“It’s nice, but one false move and there will be a serious wardrobe malfunction,” said Jim wryly.
“Would madam consider black, rather than a colour?” asked the assistant.
“Yes, I hadn’t actually discounted black,” said Tasha.
“No, I assumed as you had only selected colours,” replied the assistant as she ushered Tasha back into the changing room with several predominantly black dresses. She had dismissed three without leaving the changing room then the assistant zipped her into the fourth black one.
“I think this could be the one,” she called to herself and Jim. Turning to the assistant she asked, “Do you have any silver shoes?”
“Heels?”
Tasha nodded and like that the assistant disappeared with Tasha calling her size after her.
In an instant she had returned with a pair of metallic looking silver shoes, complete with a spike heel that looked as though it was solid steel. She slipped them on to complete the look and smiled at her reflection. The dress had a short bustier style top with straps, all hand decorated with beads, sequins and crystals, fitted tightly with a horizontal chiffon band finishing under the bust, similar to an empire line and from there the black chiffon flared out to the floor. She thought that it looked very glamorous, but incredibly sexy without being too obvious as Jim had put it.
The assistant allowed her to make an entrance into the opening of the changing area where Jim was waiting with several other husbands and boyfriends. As she appeared all of the waiting men turned to look.
“Well?” she asked.
“Very nice,” said one of the waiting men.
“Beautiful,” said another.
