“No, Romeo.” Angelo’s voice comes out raw. “He said he was overwhelmed. He had one son in prison, another who’d betrayed the family, and Mom was dying. He didn’t know how to help you, so he did what he thought was best at the time. But he came to regret it, and he wanted you to know that.”
I swallow hard, a sting in my eyes I don’t want to acknowledge.
I’ve lived with this wound inside me for so long, I’d convinced myself it didn’t have power over me anymore. But that’s a lie. Every time I leave the island, I hear my father’s voicein my head, reminding me I’m incarcerated—and I have a life sentence.
I’m not supposed to want anything more.
“I’m not leaving until you read it,” Angelo tells me.
I let him think I don’t know what he’s doing, giving me that final push. He knows how fucking stubborn I am, and he’s giving me an out, like it’s not really my decision.
I snatch the letter from the coffee table, a tremor shooting down my arm as I tear it open. I’m not sure I even intend to read it, but my eyes move over the first line…and then they keep going.
Romeo,
You know I’m not a man of many words, and I suppose that’s one thing I passed down to you. But I’d like to share a few with you now, in the hopes that you’ll take them to heart and let them free you from the chains I gave you.
There are few things I regret in my life. My sins are many, but I always prided myself on being a good husband and father, even if I wasn’t a good man. That may have been the case with my other children, but I can’t go to my grave without acknowledging that I failed you.
When I brought you home, I convinced myself that if I gave you a purpose, it would be enough. It was a selfish act that I mistook for strength.
I let you believe that the world wasn’t safe from you, but in truth, I didn’t think it was safe for you. I couldn’t control what happened to you off the island, and I couldn’t promise your mother that if you left, you wouldn’t end your life.
I wanted to protect you, but instead, I created a prison you could never leave.
As I prepare to depart this world, I can see clearly the mistakes I made. It’s too late for me to fix them, but it’s not too late for you. You’ve lived in the shadows of my decisions for too long, and I don’t want those fears to be your inheritance.
Let the boundaries and beliefs I gave you die with me.
Live on your own terms, and build the life you were denied. This is what I want for you.
And someday, if you can, find a way to forgive me.
Ti lascio solo la verità.
Papà.
Pressure buildsbehind my eyes as I stare at that letter, long past the point of reading it. Emotions are a motherfucker, and I’ve always prided myself on being untouched by such a human affliction. But this—it’s a different beast.
“Well?” Angelo prompts, reminding me that he’s still here.
I hand him the letter so he can read it himself. When he’s finished, he returns it to the table.
“He’s right, you know.”
When I don’t respond, he sighs.
“Do you want Gabriela to be happy?”
My gaze drops to the floor as the memory of our last conversation resurfaces. I’ve never felt like more of an asshole than I did that day.
“It’s all I’ve ever wanted.”
“Well, you’re doing a great job of it. You’re both fucking miserable.”
“Yeah, thanks,” I mutter.
“You’ve been with her every night, and nothing has happened,” he says. “Are you going to let this fear control the rest of your life?”
