“Stop.” I wave my hand at him. “Just stop. Words don’t mean shit when I see it every time you look at me. IknowI'm broken. I've always known it, but you…you make mefeelit.” I look down at my feet, trying to regain my composure and silence the wave of humiliation that courses through me.
I feel the heat rising on my cheeks as panic rises in my chest. A blush spreads across my face as the tears spill freely.
“He’s going to choose you,” I say, wanting to end this conversation as quickly as possible.
“What?” Ian asks, taking another step toward me, but I step back against my car to keep the distance.
“You’ve been his best friend for years,” I say, letting the alcohol dull my senses. “Mitch is going to choose you over me every single time.” My true insecurities are crawling out of the darkness into what’s left of the dying daylight.
“That’s what all this is about? Rox, you know that’s not true. He wants both of us,” Ian says, trying to reason with me.
“Yeah, sure, while it’s fun and new and exciting. But when it comes down to it...when it comes to settling down and getting serious, Mitch will choose you. The worst part is I don’t even blame him. Truly. Ian, Mitch deserves you.”
Ian’s eyes wrinkle at the edges for a moment. He inhales a deep breath and opens his mouth to speak but hesitates and lets out the breath in a huff.
“Just let me go,” I cry, my chin dimpling. “You have him all to yourself now. Go enjoy him.”
“Roxy, if I wanted you out of the picture, you wouldn’t even be here tonight,” he smiles.
“Oh, you’re threatening me now?” I say, nodding at how ridiculous this is. “I’m already walking away. Why are you trying to trip me on my way out?”
“What? No, I just…Jesus, why do you have to be so fucking difficult…I think…maybe…we should give him what he wants," he says, throwing his hands out again and letting them drop heavy against his sides—clearly a signature move.
“Oh my God,” I say, rolling my eyes. “You’re seriously considering this?”
“Did you just roll your eyes at me?” He snaps, and the shock of it lands right between my legs.
A smile grows on his lips as he crosses his arms over his chest, watching the surprise and heat dance up my cheeks as if this was the exact reaction he was expecting.
Mother Fucker knows my weaknesses. What has Mitch told him?
“I see what you’re doing,” I shake my head in disbelief that he knows the effect that would have on me. It’s so hard to resist the ache between my thighs, but I have to remind myself this isn’t real, and his intentions are clouded at best. “You don’t think this will really work, you’re just dick whipped. You will do anything he asks, and I will not compete with you in a losing game,” I say, treading lightly, not wanting to feed into this too much.
“You’re a fucking nightmare, you know that?” he says, shaking his head and raising his eyebrows.
I stand straight and cross my arms, matching his posture but not his confidence. I want to be angry. I want to scream at him and tell him all the deepest, darkest parts of me. I want to be able to tell him how fucked I am for Mitch and that the thought of losing him knocks the wind out of me. I want to tell him how hot and bothered he’s managed to get me and how unfair it is that he’s using me to satisfy his lover boy’s needs.
“I’m trying my best here, Ian, and I’m hanging on by a fucking thread,” I say, choking back more tears from spilling out of me. “Nightmare or not, I’d rather leave now than stick around long enough to have to live through losing him.”
His eyes don’t leave my face, but his mind is elsewhere. He licks his lips and focuses on me again.
“You’re seriously worried that I’m so good atfuckingthat Mitch is going to forget you're there with us?” he says, taking another step closer.
“I know how stupid it sounds. I don’t expect you to understand.”
He takes another cautious step forward, unfolding his arms as he leans closer to me. “God, you really are a cynical little shit,” he whispers.
“Don’t make fun of me,” I snap.
“Shut up,” he smiles, throwing my words back at me, closing the distance between our lips again.
My eyes flutter closed as I find myself not only allowing him to kiss me, but this time, my fingers curl at the collar of his shirt, pulling him closer. I’ve never felt so unsure about my own feelings before. I’ve never been so desperate for anyone’s approval, either. The submissive in me craves his control. To be told what to do to satisfy this newfound hunger for his attention.
My body immediately responds to the thought of Ian taking control, my brain and emotions lagging behind, desperately trying to catch up. A moan slips out into his mouth as he deepens the kiss, pulling my hips against him, our bodies fitting perfectly together. I wonder if this is what Mitch feels like when Ian kisses him.
Ian slides his hands around the back of my thighs and lifts me, carrying me over to the hood of my car, setting me down and parting my thighs as he steps between them. I wrap my legs around him instinctively, pulling him closer. His hands roam up and down my thighs, leaving a trail of heat and desire in their wake.
He pulls back from our kiss but remains close, his voice low and husky, “What if…I can guarantee there won’t be any competition between us for Mitch?”
