‘What? Wild?’
‘Nah. Kind of luminous. Like you were all lit up.’
She felt a prickle of embarrassment. ‘Oh.’
‘It was good. You know, you’ve been kinda sad recently. Not just when we spoke, but before. I noticed it. In your energy, I guess. But now…’ He looked at her. ‘I feel like I can see you, do you know what I mean?’
She looked at him; their eyes locked briefly. ‘Yes,’ she said. ‘I think I do.’
* * *
Henri was on the sofa in the living room when she got back, scrolling on his phone. He was wearing black, but this time with the print of a band she didn’t recognise on his T-shirt. He looked up at her and smiled. ‘Hello.’
‘Hi.’ She felt suddenly shy as she sat down next to him.
‘Did you have a good day?’
‘Yeah. It was lovely actually.’
‘And you are coming tonight? There is a new club and Odette?—’
She shook her head. ‘I don’t think so.’
Henri looked confused. ‘But it is Saturday,’ he said as if this explained everything.
‘I know,’ she smiled. ‘I’m just tired, I suppose. And… don’t get me wrong, I like a drink, but I think I’ve been drowning my sorrows too much recently.’
He nodded. ‘OK. You’re not sick?’
‘No. Just… old.’
He laughed. ‘Now I know you are lying!’
She touched his hand, squeezed it. For a moment, they both looked down at their joined hands. There seemed to be something unspoken between them.
‘Can I ask you something?’
‘Of course.’ Henri looked at her, his eyes bright, searching her face.
‘Might you— Do you think you might bring someone back? You know, like before?’
‘Do you want me to?’
‘No! I mean, it’s up to you, I suppose. I… guess that I’m just not that comfortable with the idea.’
He shifted towards her. ‘You want that I become your boyfriend officially?’
She paused. ‘I don’t think so.’
‘I’m sorry. I don’t understand.’ He looked at her. ‘I feel as if you are saying goodbye.’
‘Not goodbye exactly. I’m just— I suppose I think we want different things.’
‘But we have so much fun!’
‘We do. Most of the time.’
He looked at her. He was astonishingly good-looking. She was suddenly aware of his proximity. An image of their nights together flashed in her mind. But it was too complicated. There were too many lies. And although he was a nice person, she could see now that he wasn’t the right person. Her person.
