‘Please stay,’ she said. ‘I know it’s been a struggle. But please, give it another chance.’
He shook his head. ‘I’ve tried; believe me. But France was alwaysyourthing. And it’s been fun. I just don’t belong here.’
‘You can’t leave me,’ she said then, her voice stronger, more insistent. ‘We’ll try something else! We can do anything we want! You can’t throw away a marriage because a business has… well, notfailedexactly, but…’
‘We don’t want the same things. And lately we just argue all the time.’
‘But that’s normal! Marriages are like that. That’s why you work on them!’
He was silent for a moment. ‘It’s just too much. It’s too hard.’
‘So, what? You want a separation? A break?’
‘I’m sorry, Bella. I know this seems out of the blue. But for me… I’ve been thinking about this for a while.’
‘How long?’ Had he been thinking about it last summer, on their eighth wedding anniversary? Last week when they’d snuggled on the sofa in front of a romantic movie? Had he been thinking about it last night when he’d moved over to her side of the bed and begun kissing her ear?
‘Does it matter?’
‘How long?’
‘Just a few… well, months.’
‘A few months!’ Her voice was loud in the empty kitchen; the shrillness of it shocked them both.
‘I’m sorry,’ he said.
His words hung in the air. Their eyes met. And she felt her heart rate accelerate, her fingers tingle. She took in the face as familiar as her own: his short, sandy brown hair, the sun-kissed tone of his skin; the brown eyes that seem to look right into her. This was the person who’d been at her side for over a decade, who’d come with her on this adventure. She’d watched him grow into himself, mature – and knew every new line and wrinkle. Her life was anchored to his.
She saw how nothing they had built could survive his leaving – she couldn’t afford to run the B&B alone; wouldn’t be able to buy him out. She’d have to sell. Move.
‘Please, Pete. You can’t just?—’
‘Look, I know you like it here. But it can’t be just about you.’
‘Me?’
‘Your happiness.’
‘You’re happy too?’
‘I’m not!’ He stood up abruptly. ‘And maybe you’d notice that, if you weren’t so wrapped up in yourself all the time!’
‘Wrapped up in myself? All I do is work!’
‘Work and order me about.’
‘What?’
‘Oh Pete, the roof is leaking again. Pete, can you change Room 2’s bedding? Pete, make me a cup of tea,’ he said, his voice becoming a sneer.
‘But… I mean, that’s your job. Our job.’
‘I thought I’d come here and be… free. But it’s worse. Because here we don’t have any money, and this is meant to be our business, but somehow you seem to think you’re my boss.’
She tried to steady her voice, now fizzing with held-back anger. ‘I take charge becausesomeonehas to, Pete. If I didn’t tell you the roof was leaking, you’d probably not even notice!’
‘Seriously?’
