Immediately, Cassandra asks, “But what about gymnastics? After coach talks to everyone tomorrow, things will be okay again. We have a big meet next week. We have to be there for it, Mom.”
“Oh, not to worry. I’ll be driving you back and forth to school and practice, so everything will stay the same. We’ll just be staying at Grandma and Grandpa’s. That’ll be fun, right? They have a pool, and there’s that ice cream shop a few blocks away that you love.”
As hard as I’m trying to sell this abrupt change, my daughters remain silent. I need to convince them, or every moment we’re at my parents’ house will be misery. Let me see. What did they love the last time we went there?
After a few seconds, it comes to me. My father took them to that trampoline park the last time, and that’s all they could talk about for days afterward.
“What about that great place Grandpa took you to? You two loved that place. You said it was the most fun you ever had.”
For the life of me, I can’t remember the name. Thankfully, my description is enough, and Danielle squeals from the back seat, “Oh, Jump! I loved that place! Can we go there if we go to Grandma and Grandpa’s?”
Cassandra starts getting excited too, and before long, both of them are talking about how much they can’t wait to go to the trampoline park. I haven’t seen them this happy in ages. Thank God for that trampoline park. That will make having to leave home for a while much easier.
Then my younger daughter asks me a question that makes all their happiness immediately disappear. “Daddy’s coming with us, right?”
I force myself to smile when I look back at her in the rearview mirror as I stop the car at a red light. “I think he’s pretty busy at work, but you never know. Daddy sure does love to surprise us, so it could happen.”
Everything about my tone is wrong as I speak. I’m too happy. Too perky. Too up considering what’s happening to our family right now. All I can hope is my girls don’t pick up on it.
Thankfully, they’re too involved in talking about how much they can’t wait to go to the trampoline park to truly understand what I’m really feeling. All the better. They don’t deserve to have to deal with any of what’s going on. It’s bad enough they’ve had to endure the taunts of children at school and at gymnastics practice over what’s happening with their father.
Now I just have one final hurdle to overcome before we leave.
“Mom, when are we going to Grandma and Grandpa’s?” Cassandra asks. “Can we go today?”
I know she means the trampoline park more than her grandparents’ house, but I’m just glad they’re taking this news as well as they are. “Actually, we’re going to go home and pack, and then we’ll set off for their house.”
My daughters laugh and start planning on what tricks they want to try when they go to the park. Thank God children are resilient. I’ve been dealing with the same treatment they’re getting from their classmates and teammates, and I’m not handling it anywhere as well as they are. I wish I could be as easily distracted by a couple hours of jumping on a trampoline.
By the time we reach our house, they’re so excited they bound out of the car into the house. I follow them, noticing on my way up the sidewalk to my front door that Mrs. Campbell across the street is standing on her porch glaring at me. What did I ever do to her to warrant this? Last year when her furnace went out during that cold snap and the repairman couldn’t come out for three days while she had to say in a freezing house, who cooked her hot meals and brought her a space heater and blankets? Nobody else in the neighborhood but me, and yet now when there’s talk about my husband possibly killing that poor man, she looks at me like I’m a criminal.
So much for innocent until proven guilty.
I see Connor immediately as I walk in the house, and as soon as my gaze falls on him, I know this mess has taken its toll. The dark circles under his eyes give away that he hasn’t slept well in days. Never a truly good looking man, he’s always had a look about him that showed he was fun. That’s gone now, replaced by worry that appears to have been permanently etched into his face.
“The girls told me you’re taking them to your parents’ house and to some park they like. Is it an amusement park or something?”
I study the confusion in his eyes and realize he has no idea what park they’re so excited about, even though they and I told him all about it as soon as we came home last summer. They raved for days about every flip and jump they performed that afternoon.
Does he ever listen to us when we talk to him?
As I walk past him into the kitchen to get a drink of iced tea, I answer, “No, it’s a trampoline park, Connor. You should know this.”
Behind me, he says, “I’ve been a little preoccupied with other things lately, Jamie.”
I don’t want to have a fight right now, but his ignorance about everyone but himself suddenly makes me want to scream. I struggle to keep my temper under control, silently telling myself there’s nothing to be gained by an argument.
“It’s a trampoline park. My father took them the last time we were there to visit. Remember, last summer when you were too busy to come with us?”
“Don’t start, Jamie. I had to work. Not all of us get to just flit around and come and go as we please. Some of us have to work a job to pay for everything.”
I don’t know if it’s his snotty tone of voice or his bringing up that I don’t work again, even though he was the one who insisted I be a stay-at-home mother once the girls were born. Maybe it’s just that I’m sick and tired of being a social pariah because of my dear husband. Whatever it is about him right now, I’m tired of everything about this man.
Spinning around to face him, I snap, “Don’t start? Well, I have an idea. How about I finish? I’m taking the girls to my parents’ for a while. I don’t know how long. You’re welcome to come visit as often as you like, but since you’ve only been to their house once in the entire fifteen years we’ve been married, let’s just say I’m not making any bets on you actually showing up.That’s entirely up to you. I’m sure your daughters would love to see you. As for me, I’m done being the reason you’re miserable, Connor. What’s happened to you is because of you and no one else. Go live with that for a while.”
He says something about how I should be supporting him in his time of need, but I’m not listening anymore. I have a bag to pack and the girls’ clothes to get ready to go to my parents’ house. I don’t have time to listen to him complain.
Those days are over.
