The morning light filters through the blinds in fractured streaks, thin slashes of gold against the gray. My head pounds not from booze, but from everything I didn’t say.
I didn’t sleep much. Every time I closed my eyes, I saw her, standing in that driveway, arms wrapped around herself, trying not to cry.
I can still feel the weight of her silence pressing against my chest.
The coffee machine sputters to life, filling the loft with the rich, familiar scent of dark roast. Normally, it’s comforting. Today, it just seems barren.
I check my phone. No new messages. No calls. She’s finally stopped trying. That realization hurts more than I expected. I scroll through her last texts.
I’m sorry.
Please call me.
Can we talk?
Yet I can’t bring myself to reply. What would I even say?Sorry I accused you of still being in love with your ex? Sorry I acted like an asshole because I was scared?
The door creaks open behind me. Alec doesn’t knock anymore. He doesn’t have to.
He steps inside with the same steady calm he’s always had, dressed in jeans and a thick sweater, a paper bag of pastries in one hand. I’d left a voicemail for him on my way home, giving no details but letting him know I was headed back.
No doubt, he’s put things together. He knows me well enough, seeing Olivia is my number one priority. I should be there, with her, and yet here I am back in Montreal.
“You look like shit.” He sets the bag on the counter.
“Good morning to you too.” I run a hand over my face.
He eyes me for a beat, then pours himself a mug of coffee. “You and Olivia have a fight?”
I don’t answer right away, just lean back against the counter, watching the steam rise from my cup.
“Yeah. More like I fucked up.”
Alec nods slowly, like he saw that coming. “Want to tell me about it?”
I shrug. “Not really.”
Unfazed, he nods. “Let me guess, something to do with her ex?”
My eyes flick up, surprised. “How do you?—”
“Because it’s always something to do with the ex,” he interrupts, lips quirking. “You love her, and you hate thatsomeone else had her first. That’s human. What’s not human is expecting her to erase twenty years of her life because it makes you uncomfortable.”
I open my mouth to argue that he doesn’t even know what went down. But he lifts a hand, stopping me. “Before you say it, yes, I know what it’s like. I was jealous as hell when Bas’s first love came back into town years ago. Thought I’d lose him.” His eyes soften, hazy with memory. “Turns out, love doesn’t work like that. You don’t erase what came before. You just become what’s next.”
I stare at him, the truth of his words landing heavier than I’d like to admit.
He leans back against the island. “You’ve both been through a lot this year. Losing Bas broke you. It’s okay that you’re still finding your footing. But don’t take that grief and turn it into something it’s not.”
“I know.” My voice is low, rough. “I just…panicked. She didn’t answer my calls, and I thought—” I stop myself, shaking my head. “Doesn’t matter.”
“It does.” Alec’s gaze sharpens. “You thought you were losing her.”
I don’t respond, but the truth hangs there, heavy between us.
He takes a sip of his coffee. “So, what are you going to do?”
I let out a slow breath, staring at the window where the light’s grown brighter, sharper. “I don’t know. I said things I can’t take back.”
