Cole's arm tightened around us both. "We should head down. The ranger's probably having a heart attack."
"One more minute," I said. "Please."
We sat there in the gathering darkness, the three of us, watching the last of the light fade. Sarah was warm against myside, Cole solid at my back. The mountain spread out below us, no longer a threat but a testament to something bigger than my fear.
Lily had died on a mountain. That was true, and it would always be true. But Lily had also lived on mountains, she had laughed and explored and found joy in these wild, dangerous, beautiful places. Her death wasn't the mountain's fault any more than it was mine. It was just life, random and cruel and unstoppable.
And if life was going to take the people I loved eventually, then I had a choice. I could hide from love, build walls, and protect myself into a lonely, hollow existence. Or I could love fiercely, openly, vulnerably, and accept that the pain of loss was the price of admission.
Standing here, holding Sarah, feeling Cole's steady presence behind me, the choice seemed obvious.
The descent was slow and careful, flashlight beams cutting through the darkness. Cole held Sarah's hand on one side; I walked close on the other. The ranger radioed ahead that we'd found her, and I heard the cheers echo faintly from the base.
Halfway down, Sarah reached for my hand too. Her small fingers laced through mine, cold and trusting.
"Emma?"
"Yeah, sweetheart?"
"Are you gonna stay? For real this time?"
I squeezed her hand, blinking back fresh tears. "Yes. For real. I'm done running away."
"Promise?"
"I promise."
She was quiet for a moment. Then: "Good. Because I missed you a lot."
"I missed you too. More than you know."
Cole glanced over at me in the darkness. I couldn't see his expression, but I felt his hand brush against my back—a brief, warm touch that said everything words couldn't.
18.Emma
At the trailhead, the chaos of earlier had settled into quiet efficiency. Rangers spoke into radios, confirming Sarah was found, calling off the wider search. Someone tried to wrap a foil blanket around my shoulders. I waved them off.
"Ma'am, you're shaking."
"I'm fine. I'm just—" I looked at Cole, at Sarah sleeping against his back. "I'm fine."
The ranger gave me a skeptical look but moved on.
Cole settled Sarah into his truck, tucking a blanket around her with a gentleness that made my chest ache. She stirred slightly, murmured something unintelligible, and burrowed deeper into the seat.
I stood by my car, keys in hand. The logical thing was to drive home. Take a hot shower. Process everything alone in my empty cabin, the way I'd been processing everything for the past year.
The thought made me physically ill.
"Emma?" Cole had closed Sarah's door and was walking toward me. "You okay to drive?"
"I don't want to go home."
The words came out before I could stop them. Raw. Honest. Completely terrifying.
He stopped a few feet away, studying my face in the erratic glow of his taillights. "Okay."
"Can we... can we go somewhere? To talk?" I swallowed hard. "I need to say some things. And I don't think I can say them in a parking lot surrounded by park rangers."
