My phone buzzed again. Cole this time.
A photo filled the screen. Him and Sarah, grinning beside a beehive. Sarah was drowning in an oversized bee suit, only her bright eyes visible. Cole's arm was wrapped around her, his smile easy and unguarded.
Assistant beekeeper's first inspection,the caption read.She named the queen Beatrice.
The image blurred. I blinked, and tears splashed onto the screen, distorting their happy faces.
Another buzz. Another text.
Cole
Sarah says Beatrice has better hair than me. Feeling personally attacked by a bee.
I laughed, but my voice was broken.
Buzz.
Cole
How was your day?
Buzz.
Cole
Thinking about you.
I started typing a response.Good day. Miss you too.Normal words. Safe words.
My fingers hovered over send.
I deleted it.
What was I doing? What had I been doing all this time?
Cole lived on that mountain. He walked those trails like I walked to my mailbox. He checked hives on steep slopes in uncertain weather. He was strong and careful and experienced.
So was Lily.
Sarah ran those trails like a playground. She knew every rock, every root, every shortcut. She was learning to love the wilderness the way her uncle did.
The wilderness that didn't discriminate. That didn't care how much you were loved or who needed you.
I'd painted a future in my head. Cozy winters in his cabin. Summer picnics in wildflower meadows. Sarah calling me Mommy without hesitation. Growing old together on that beautiful, deadly mountain.
"What were you thinking?" I whispered.
The wind answered with another howl.
I pulled myself off the floor. My legs were unsteady, but they held. I paced the small living room, five steps one way, five steps back.
Buzz.
Cole
Are you there?
Did you fall asleep grading papers again?
