“I’m serious, Van. I really wanna know.”
“Oh, word?” His brows lifted. “You wanna know how I’m doing all of a sudden? If you truly wanted to know how I’ve been, you could’ve picked up the fucking phone, Irish.”
Nodding, she understood his perspective. “I wasn’t dodging you on purpose. I just needed space.”
“Or you needed to run back to Noble’s bitch-ass.”
“I know you think that was the case, but I needed time away from you. You wouldn’t let me go, Van, so I took it. I know it wasn’t right to ignore you, but I felt that I did what’s best.”
He shook his head, scoffing at her explanation. “You're selfish, Irish.”
“And you're not?” she retorted, looking him up and down.
“I never said I wasn’t, but me and you made promises to each other. I expected you to keep them.”
“Well, promises are meant to be broken.”
Jovanis scratched through his nest of locs that were piled on top of his head. “I never imagined you not being in my life, Irish.”
“And you don't have to. I told you I would always be there for you.”
“Until Noble came through.” He smirked. “When that nigga came into your life, you switched up on me. And don't say that you didn’t.”
Irish couldn’t deny his claim. Noble was a hurricane. He came into her existence and blew what she thought she knewwith his winds. He wiped out any remnants of another man, including Jovanis.
“I’ll accept everything that you're saying.” She swallowed hard. “Maybe I did switch up when I started dealing with him, but you switched up, too.”
“How?” His angry eyes seared into her.
“When you got with your guy, you stopped coming home. How many times I used to ask you to spend time with me? We became distant because you had gotten wrapped up in your love life. How come it’s cool when you do it but a tragedy when I do it?”
Jovanis looked away, appearing to be in deep thought. Irish didn’t have the words to convey how lonely Jovanis had made her. It lasted for almost two years. Jovanis had forgotten about Irish. He didn’t make her his top priority, which was why she didn’t care about him being hurt.
“A’ight, I can admit that I did leave you alone a lot. A nigga fell in love. Shit, I’m still in love with somebody who don't want to be with me.”
Irish grabbed his hand as he put his head down on his forearm. The agony that Jovanis held was heartbreaking. She rubbed the back of his neck as they sat in a silence they both needed. Their thoughts took over, permitting them from speaking for a while. Despite the cease in oral communication, no one knew them better than each other.
He lifted his head. “You wanna know who I fell in love with?”
Irish bobbed her head, dying to know.
“Tuck.”
Irish’s hand flew to her mouth as her eyes ballooned.
“I know.” He chuckled at her reaction. “You never thought he was gay, right?”
“Hell no I never expected that from Tuck. The way he used to run through women now makes sense. Well, did he love you back?”
“Shit, I don't know. He used to tell me that he did, but he was playing with my emotions. He was fucking another nigga in TLM. I hate his bitch-ass,” he griped.
“Oh, Van, I’m sorry that happened.” She rubbed his hand. “Wait a minute. All this time that you’ve been spending away from the house and claiming you were with your guy was what? A front ‘cause Tuck has been locked up for a while now.”
Pushing out a weighted breath, he nodded. “Yeah, I’ve been lying. I was depressed so I stayed away from you. All those times when I told you he wants to come out was me wanting him to step out with me. His refusal is what left me frustrated. I apologize for lying to you, Irish. I feel bad about that.”
“Wow,” she whispered, not knowing how to respond to his revelation.
“Irish, I fell hard too,” he admitted. “That nigga had me so gone, I was ready to come out the closet and be with him. I didn’t give a fuck because I had the man I loved, but he insists that he’s not gay.”
