“Do you want me to go up with you?”
I stare at the yellow house sitting beyond the picturesque lawn. The white trim running along the top, the windows that could use a cleaning, the old playset that’s outside on the yard.
“No.”
Movement flutters past the window, blurry silhouettes that resemble grainy figures on a photograph.
“A charming setting for the Charming's.”
There’s an emptiness to my words, a hollow echo that gives away the void inside.
“Come on girls!”
The door opens and a cluster of blonde curls comes barreling through.
Giggling and falling over each other, the two girls vary in age but are similar in appearance. Features that complement their attractive mother who steps over the threshold, smiling and talking with the man who follows closely behind.
Aurora Charming hustles my sisters into a nearby minivan, her exasperated expression full of love and understanding. She looks like an older softer version of myself, her summer dress as pink and pretty as the woman wearing it.
My father wraps an arm around her, his nose similar to the one I find in the mirror. His features are reflected more clearly in the girls running around him, the older one boasting our father’s chin while the other one got his eyes and darker hair.
I feel nothing as I stare at the people who share my bloodline. Not a drop of recognition, not a hint of yearning to know the parents who lost their daughter before she could remember their names.
I wanted to feel like I was finally home.
Not feel emptier than before.
“I’ve seen enough.”
“That’s it?” Disbelief clouds Christopher’s eyes, “You don’t want to go say hi?”
“Look at this place, Devil. Look atthem.”
There’s blood splatter on my clothes. Human flesh stuck beneath the vicious point of my nails and these people are going out for an afternoon adventure.
A friendly outing with the whole family.
“I don’t belong here.”
Curling my nails into my fists, I feel them leave a mark. An indent that matches the cuts and bruises covering my body, the ridged surface of a monster hiding in plain daylight.
I don’t belong anywhere.
My eyes latch onto the stitches running along Christopher’s neck, the black thread jutting through his skin. Gruesome and vulgar, it’s the only thing that feels real in these picture-perfect suburbs.
The only thing I find myself capable of holding onto.
“Are you sure?”
Emotions clog my throat as I look at the family who left me behind. Packed up, moved on and had a couple more daughters to replace the one they had lost.
“The girl they knew… she died a long time ago.”
My gaze lingers on my mother’s easy smile, the lightness in her step that I will never understand.
“I wouldn’t have stopped, you know.” Sorrow leaks into Christopher’s voice, “I wouldn’t have stopped searching for you.”
A foreign, burning sensation builds at the back of my eyes.
