Once the appetizers and wine came, I felt a little more at ease. Jordy’s looming presence didn’t irritate me enough to make me not want to enjoy the crab cakes that the waitress raved about. After not eating half the day due to my nerves, I was starving. I tore into one of the crab cakes with my fork and closed my eyes as the sweet and flaky combination hit my palate.
“Pretty good?” Jase questioned as I picked up my glass of wine.
“They’re delicious. I see you’ve almost finished yours.”
“Yeah, it’s one of my favorite things on the menu. The calamari is pretty good too, tender and not too rubbery.”
“I’ll have to keep that in mind for when I come back.”
“You should.” He nodded.
“The wine is good too. I’m actually kinda glad I came. I didn’t know how bad I needed to get out of the house.”
“I’m glad you came too. Look, Harp, I know how you feel about reliving the past, but I would be remiss if I didn’t say anything. I know I hurt you. That party was completely my idea, and I’m sure whatever you saw was my fault too. You know he wasn’t a drinker. I influenced him to loosen up and indulge. I felt like I was losing him. This was on me, not him. I know my actions were fucked up and caused unnecessary pain to the two people I love the most. I promise I’ll never hurt you again, Harper. If you let me, I’ll spend the rest of my life making it up to you.”
I waved him off. “Thank you for saying that, but I promise you don’t have to do that.”
“But I do. I need you to forgive me, Harp. JoJo never fully forgave me. He won’t say it, but I know it’s true. He blames me for us losing you.”
“Jordy was an adult just as well as you were, Jase. You might have brought the girls there, but you didn’t put his dick in thatgirl’s mouth and make him sit there and take it. Don’t put that on yourself. It’s not fair that he did.”
“Yes it is, Harp. He didn’t want to be there. He told me not to invite the girls, but I insisted.”
“What did you order?” I asked, changing the subject to something that actually mattered right now.
“Blackened halibut and roasted vegetables. I’ll have some of your sea bass.”
“Oh no you won’t. You should have ordered what you wanted. I don’t even let my son eat off my plate.”
That made him grin. “I don’t have to eat off your plate. You can just feed it to me.”
“Yeah, right.”
When our entrees came, I tried not to notice Jordy leaving the bar. I was just grateful that he was gone. It was silly that I missed his presence at the same time. I was so annoyed with myself that I couldn’t stand it.
When Jordy came to me with the concept of voyeurism, I thought he was crazy. That was until I went down a rabbit hole, researching and trying to understand why he and his brother were so into it, watching each other. Instead of being disgusted like I expected myself to be, I became intrigued and then enthralled.
It didn’t take long for me to figure out that I was just as twisted as my guys. I especially loved for my quiet, sweet JoJo to watch me with Jase. It was amazing to see how he reasserted his dominance when I was back in his arms.
Over time, I became obsessed with the back-and-forth and the way both of them seemed to worship the ground I walked on in public, no matter what we did behind closed doors. Too much time had passed though. Plus, now as a thirty-year-old woman and not a twenty-year-old girl, I knew better than to get involvedwith brothers. I learned the hard way how that could affect my life. I didn’t need to be taught again.
“I’m enjoying spending time with you, but I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t tell you how bad I want to fuck you right now. I’m talking on this table right now, especially with him watching.”
“Oh, wow,therehe is,” I said, shaking my head as I took a sip of my wine.
“I’ve been here, baby. I’m nothing if I’m not a gentleman, but know that I want to fuck the lining out of your thick ass right here on this table. The only thing stopping me is the fact that someone in here might recognize me as their child’s pediatrician.”
I scoffed. “Thank goodness for that.”
“That’s the only thing saving you.”
“You were always good with kids. It tracks that you became a pediatrician.”
“Yeah. My dad tried to force us all into orthopedics, but as long as I’m a surgeon, he’s good with it. How is your son anyway?” Jase asked, looking up from his meal.
“Why?”
“Damn, I can’t ask about your son?”
