“No. Not really. Haven’t seen her since Kacey was a baby. We text every once in a while, but it’s how it’s always been. Strained. Awkward. She’s unconcerned with my life and my struggles. Only cares about her own.”
“I’m sorry.”
I made lots of mental notes. I’d heard most of this before, but a lot felt like new info. Or maybe I was just listening in a new way. “Have you told me this before?”
“Maybe. Not sure.”
“Did you feel like they dropped you off because you were difficult?”
“For sure. I hated Trent, was angry at my dad for jetting. Thought my mom was a doormat. I was moody and impossible.” She shrugged. “I don’t know. It kind of felt like she just pawned me of on Granny instead of helping me.”
She didn’t have a place. A belonging growing up. She wasstuck between so many different people and realities. That knowledge hit me for the first time ever.
Is that why she was so obsessed with togetherness? With making a home and having a family? Not sure how I’d never put two and two together.
She looked up at me and I realized how close we were. Throughout the conversation, someone had subconsciously closed the distance. Probably me. She was lying on her back and I was propped up on an elbow, looking over her.
“I hate that you didn’t have anyone for so long.”
She rolled to her side, propping up on her elbow. “It all worked out. I’m okay.”
“Are you?”
She shrugged. “I think so.”
“I’m glad you didn’t stay in Texas. That you’re here—with me.”
I let my eyes trail downward. I couldn’t help it. The way she was propped up drew my eyes to the twists and turns of her curves. I knew every slope and angle of her body. Something my brain wouldn’t ever let me forget. The strap on her dress was falling to the side.
I swallowed hard, willing myself to look back at her face.
When I did, she was looking at me the same way. Eyes trailing downward, a firm swallow, then back to my face.
My heart pumped hard, felt my skin heating.
What I was feeling, what I wanted, was not one sided.
Her gaze settled on my lips again. And mine to hers.
She wanted to kiss me. And the knowledge kept me on the edge of our precipice. Silently begging her to push us over the brink. I wouldn’t do it even though every cell in my body was begging me to.
She needed to want us enough to take the risk.
And I’d chase every crumb she threw me.
I whispered, “You want to kiss me.”
She said nothing. Wet her lips.
“Do you?”
“Yes.” She said softly.
The energy in my body built to a low buzz in my gut, made my breathing go weird.
“But that doesn’t change anything.” She tried to look at my face, but her gaze kept rebelling, dropping to my mouth repeatedly. “I—I won’t toy with you, Jack.”
I scooted a couple inches closer, our knees touching. I slipped my fingers into her hair, needy for some kind of contact. “Toy with me. I can handle it.”
