We’d become friends over the last few weeks, and restating the rulesagainprobably gave him the wrong impression, made him think I only wanted him for the sex.
He straightened his spine, preparing to get up. I grabbed his arm.
“You don’t have to go,” I said, trying to smooth over the jagged edges.
“I don’t want to overstay my welcome.” He looked like a little puppy that had just been kicked for pissing on the rug, only glancing at me out of the corner of his eye, tail between his legs. I hated seeing that look on his face.
I moved onto his lap, straddling him, so he had no choice but to look at me. His hands went to my thighs automatically, skimming up to the material of my shorts and fidgeting with the hem.
“I didn’t want you to think you had to stay out of some sort of obligation to keep me distracted. I’m fine.”
I didn’tneedhim to stay, but I sure as hellwantedhim to.
Why was admitting that to myself so hard? I hated the thought of needing him tonight, as if I couldn’t handle it on my own.I hated the idea of needing anyone, if I were being honest.
He stared me down, dissecting me with his gaze.
“Really! I’m fine. I swear.” My voice shook on the last word, unable to keep my tone even as I thought about lying in the dark alone after watching someone die right in front of me.
His lips tipped up in a sly grin. “Okay, you don’tneedme to stay. I’m not duty-bound to be here.”
“Right. You can go if you want. I’mfine.”
“The amount of times you’ve said the wordfinemakes me question that. But for argument’s sake, let’s say you are fine. What if I don’twantto go?” he asked, locking eyes with me. Studying me like he could read every emotion written there.
“Then stay,” I said simply.
It was the best I could give him. My permission to break the rules I’d made.
He nodded. “Okay, good. I’ll stay. I don’t think you’re done being distracted yet,” he answered, his hands gripping my ass and grinding me onto his cock, which was already half-hard under his boxers.
I laughed, grateful to be back where we were both most comfortable. Where it was just deliriously good sex and we were only sating something physical, a fleshly desire that could be fulfilled and reciprocated with little risk of a broken heart.
“You know, I’m always up for a goodDICKstraction,” I said.
“Lucky for you, I have the bestDICKstractiontechniques.”
I leaned down, shutting him up with my mouth. The faint taste of my arousal lingered, and I hummed at the memory of his skilled fingers stroking my inner walls until I came apart. Later, I’d grab him some mouthwash, but for now, I savored the bit of me that still clung to him.
I got lost in the feeling of him beneath me, his heated touch on my skin, his taste on my tongue and the sound of his groans echoing in the apartment.
He felt like safety and adventure, home and an escape, all wrapped together.
Friends having fun. That’s all this was supposed to be. All I thought I wanted. Definitely allhewanted.
Something stirred in my chest, a flutter of longing for something more. Something real. But I stamped it down, reminding myself that trying to pin Ben down was a fool’s errand.
Feelings weren’t part of this agreement. I rebuilt the wall around my heart, wondering how he’d managed to tear it down in the first place.
I needed to take back control. I wanted him at my mercy now. Begging for me the way he made me beg for him.
I pushed myself off his lap and grabbed his hand, pulling him off the couch. My lips brushed over the smooth expanse of his chest, drifting down his stomach over the light trail of hair to the waist of his underwear,lingering over his hardening length. My breath whispered past it to his thighs, causing his dick to twitch.
I smirked up at him from my knees, feeling the heat from his gaze burning across my skin. I tugged his boxers down just enough for his cock to spring free. My fingers wrapped around his thick shaft, giving it a light stroke before I gripped it tighter, making him grunt. I pumped him a few times, watching as his head tipped back and his eyes closed. My hands stilled on him, and he moved his hips, urging me to keep going.
I dropped my hand to my thigh, wanting him to watch me when I took him into my mouth.
“Ben?”
