Tyler pushed off from the wall, spring-loaded, storming to the exit.
“Mark, right?” Matt glanced at my ID then back at me. “I’m going to do you a favor and assume you didn’t know you were accompanying a minor to a bar. But, honestly, this doesn’t look good.”
Across the street, Tyler stormed in a tight, furious circle. I dashed through the traffic. A car honked, the driver shouting.
“So stupid,” Tyler said, waving a cigarette. “I’ve been going to bars since I was fifteen. Now I have to pay a hundred bucks for another ID.”
“Tyler—this isn’t a joke.”
“What’s the big deal?”
“Are you kidding me? We could have gotten in serious trouble.” Rage and panic coursed through me. “Do you understand?” He said nothing. “Tyler, are you listening to me? This isn’t a fucking joke.”
“Mark.” His voice had changed, gone soft and low. His eyes widened. “You’re hurting me.”
And then I saw. I had grabbed him, gripping his shoulder. I didn’t even remember reaching for him. I let go, my fingershumming with the afterburn of strain. I looked at my hand then down. Tyler had dropped the cigarette, or I had shaken it from him; it smoked at his feet.
“Let’s just get back to Sawyer,” I said, and turned from him, already walking away. “This is a goddamn mess.”
We drove home, the drone of silence cut only by the low whoosh of an occasional car passing by. My hands were shaking and I squeezed the wheel to steady myself.
I had been a complete fool—and for what? What did I think was going to happen today? Tyler’s disappearance from the library, his lost hours, that idiot from the bar, cocaine or something on his face—how had any of this become part of my day? I didn’t know what was going on between Tyler and Addison, and I didn’t want to. He said it himself, it was silly college shit. What did that say about me? I couldn’t shake the image of the bar manager taunting me, holding my license like it was my fate. I could have been seriously fucked. And I had gotten so angry, I’d grabbed Tyler without even knowing it. What if I had done worse?
We reached our exit. I retraced our route back to the parking lot. The doughnut shop was closed, and the laundromat, too. Only the liquor store was open, its neon sign casting a lurid green across the lot. I parked and shut the engine. For the first time since we’d gotten in the car, I turned to Tyler. He looked at me, calm and expectant, the curve of his cheek pulsing in the lights.
“Listen,” I said. “I’m sorry about what happened. I didn’t mean to grab you—”
“It’s fine.”
“No, it isn’t.” And when he tried again to interrupt, I cut him off. “It’s not. I’m sorry. I lost my head.”
“Don’t be upset. Really, it’s okay, I get it. I know I can be a lot.”
“I didn’t think this day through. I shouldn’t have brought you along.”
“Don’t say that. It was my idea.”
“Okay. But I’m the adult here.”
He snorted. “I’m nineteen.”
I let out a long breath and closed my eyes. And then I felt a hand on my arm—my eyes sprung open: Tyler’s fingers, light on my sleeve. I looked from his hand to his face.
“Let’s just pretend it didn’t happen, okay?” His voice wavered and cracked, eyes holding mine. “Everything turned out fine, right?”
“I don’t know.” I wanted what he was offering: forgiveness, reprieve. “Maybe it did.”
He sighed and pulled his hand away, his smile a shot through the dark. “Okay, good. We’re good.” I could feel the soft press of his fingers on me still. “I’m telling you, last time I got busted with a fake ID, it did not go that well.”
I laughed, I couldn’t help it. “I do not want to know.”
“You really don’t.” And Tyler laughed as well. “I never asked how your research went. Did you find what you were looking for?”
The archives seemed a lifetime ago.
“I did, actually. It was a good start.”
“That’s great, that’s what matters.” He smiled. “Don’t worry about tonight.”
