I shut my eyes tight, knowing he’s right. “Shit,” I whisper to myself. I bite my lip, take a breath, then glance briefly towards Scott. “I’m sorry, Scott.” It pains me to say it, butmaybe this time it’s me who’s being unreasonable. I take another breath. “Okay, so let me get my head around this.” I look straight into his eyes this time. “If my mum and your dad really were together,” then it dawns on me. “Oh shit. My mother and… Jesus, my fucking mother broke up your parent’s marriage, which is why you hate me, right?” I close my eyes using my lids as a barrier against my impending tears. Ash’s arms wrap around my shoulder, pulling me in, but all I feel is sick. “I’m sorry, Scott, I had absolutely no idea. Of course, you wanted to get back at me.” I shake my head with disbelief.
“No Calla, that’s not it.”
“What?” I question while attempting to wipe away my falling tears with the back of my hand. When I clear my misty view, I notice glistening sweat on his brow.
“I had no idea about the affair when it happened because I wasn’t born.”
“You weren’t?”
“No. And neither were you.”
“I am so confused, Scott.” As I wipe my remaining tears away, my head swells with pain.
“Just say it mate.” Ash’s voice vibrates against my ear now resting against his chest.
Scott scratches the side of his head. “Shit, this is hard,” he mumbles, laying his hands flat against the table. “So, I had a thing for you, right?” I bow my head slightly in response from the safe enclose of Ash’s arms, then Scott continues, “And Dad got wind of my giant crush when the lads were round at mine after school one time. They were messing around in front of him and it came out. It was all a joke to start with, but he ended up grilling me when they left. Eventually, he came clean because… because you were more than just some girl at school. He didn’t want me to get involved with you. Not as friends and especially not as a girlfriend.”
“What do you mean?”
“I’m so sorry.” His hand rests over his mouth; his fingers pull down his face and over his chin. “There was never a good time to tell you, but you and me, we’re… we’re… fuck Calla.” He rubs his forehead, then looks me clearly in the eye. “You’re my half-sister.”
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
CALLA
My heart stops,my head spins. I open my mouth, but nothing comes out. Thank God Ash is here to keep me upright.
“Are you alright baby?”
I blink several times and shake my head. “I think so.”
I can’t believe this. Scott and me… no. The icy shudder of cold blood runs through my veins. Of all the things I expected him to say, being his half-sister wasn’t it. What the actual fuck. I’m still dumbfounded when he continues, “My parents never separated over the affair and somehow, Mum forgave him, but of course, when Dad told me about you… let’s just say it was a shock for all of us. My poor mum had no idea about you until things came to ahead. She left him straight away once she found out. When she explained things to me, she said she could just about forgive the affair, but a child he’d kept secret for sixteen years nearly killed her. From my point of view, your existence tore my parents apart. I was angry at you for being the one who broke my mum’s heart. Then I hated you for making a fool out of me. I’d fallen for my sister. Ash’s obvious thing for you didn’t help either.”
“You know if I’d had any idea mate, I would have held back a bit when I was sticking up for Calla, although it was still no excuse for being cruel to her. You were out of order.”
“I’m not gonna deny what I did was wrong Ash, but sixteen is a confusing age—even without the family situation to deal with.”
“Wait,” I say, gathering my thoughts. “When did you find out?” I ask Ash.
“Scott called me last week. We went out for a drink and he told me everything. You understand why it had to be Scott’s decision to tell you.”
“Yeah…yes, of course.”
“But I thought you might need a friend when the time came, so I made Scott promise to call me.”
“Thank you,” I say, still clearly in shock and my tears fall quicker than I can catch them. “Sorry, Scott, I interrupted you.”
“That’s okay,” he smiles. He’s obviously been waiting a long time to get this off his chest, so I imagine a few more minutes won’t make a lot of difference to him. He pauses for a beat, and then his next words catch me off guard.
“Calla, do you have any idea how beautiful you are?”
How the hell do I reply? He waits for an answer I can’t give. I don’t know where he’s going with this.
“What I’m trying to say is, not only did Ash want you, so did half the boys in our year, but you were so unassuming and grounded. Unlike a lot of the girls in our year, you never paraded yourself around school thinking you were something special. It was difficult for me to hear the lads talking about you in that way. I wanted to hurt them all and not in a brotherly, protective way, but a jealous one. It’s the reason I treated you so badly. I had all these feelings for you which weren’t right anymore, at least, this is what my therapist thinks.”
“You’ve been seeing someone?” I sniff half dazed.
“I decided to do something about it after Mum died; I was going off the rails. Leaving school and going to college helped initially; I didn’t have to see you anymore, but I could never quite get to grips with everything. The therapy really helped.”
