“No other girl holds a candle to you, no one else.”
Of course—it began to make sense. He was preparing me before I found out the truth. How many times did he tell me he loved me that night? And, oh my God, the best line of all. I remember asking him,“What happens if some girl comes along, and you’re…lonely.”
“It won’t happen,”he’d said—cool as you like.
It was all bullshit.
As the days pass, I try to process everything, maybe I overthink it. Especially when it comes to Ash being with someone else. Why did it have to be Dani? And to think, I felt sorry for her at the festival. She seemed a little vulnerable, and I thought she might need a friend. I saw another side to her for just a short time and was convinced there was a decent person underneath the persona. I can’t get over how wrong I was.
And who, exactly, was the other girl? How did she fit in? How did he flip from one to the other? After the shot of him nearly nose-diving into her cleavage, did they start something? Actually, that’s a good point, which way around was it? I mean, he might have been with the other girl first, decided she wasn’t for him then had a go at sticking it on Dani. Did it go further than a kiss? I can’t bear to think of him holding, kissing, caressing another girl. It doesn’t matter which one of the two it was because my imagination is filling the gaps and conjuring images I can’t deal with. I’ve got to stop this self-torture.
I’ve never been in love before, so I don’t get why there’s no warning from anyone of how painful it is when your heart breaks.
Scott has been incredible considering how difficult this situation is for him; he’s stuck in the middle. Evidently, Ash is calling Scott after I don’t pick up. I usually get Scott’s call just a few minutes after. I understand he’s talking to both me and Ash while being so careful not to upset the other.
Today I have to haul myself out of bed before lunch, get in the shower and try to dress in something other than my sweatshirt and joggers. Scott is coming up to see me.
He’s given me something significant to focus on, which I’m grateful. It all stemmed from the conversation I had withmy mother a while ago. She led me to question who my actual father might be, and I had to find out if Scott was really my half-brother. It was something I needed to know for my own peace of mind, especially now. I feel so alone.
I still have Nanna and Gramps to talk to, of course. They are amazing, and I often wonder where I’d be without them but having Scott around has made a massive difference in my life. We’ve been building a friendship and a strong bond. Part of me doesn’t want to sever that. He is now the one constant in my life I can’t afford to be without.
Perhaps working so closely together in the café had helped. We talked a lot about our lives growing up, which was good therapy for both of us. I had to get used to my enemy becoming my friend and he had a few demons to set free too. It was meant to be this way. If we weren’t a little older, maybe I wouldn’t give him the time of day, but I see now, he deserved a second chance. We both do.
When Mum dropped the bombshell of not knowing who my real father was, part of me was scared stiff. I faced no longer having Scott in my life and was convinced that we wouldn't be friends if we weren’t related. I hoped we would; prayed in fact. Never in a million years would I have said that a year ago, but he’s grown on me and I like having a sibling. Now there’s the threat of not having the same father, it worries me. I think it worries Scott too because we decided between us to clarify the situation. We got in contact with one of those online DNA agencies and ordered the kit. One buccal swab and a week later, we have the results. We’re both nervous, so decided we should open our letters together, although they send a copy to both parties.
I must have been in the shower when Angie called this morning and now she’s sent a text asking me to get in touch as soon as possible. I’m guessing she’s checking up on me,but also wants to know the results from our test. She knew Scott was coming to see me today, but my best friend will have to wait for now.
This is the first time Scott has visited me at uni. When I open the door, he takes an apprehensive step forward, a half-smile on his face as if he’s unsure if a hug is appropriate. I decide to take the lead and hold out my arms. He seems pleased and immediately sweeps me up.
“I’ve missed you, Calla.” He squeezes me tight before putting me down and pulling back to take me in. His brow wrinkles. “You look a little pale and you’ve lost too much weight.” There’s genuine concern in his voice.
“Honestly? I’ve been better.”
“I’m worried about you,” he says, stepping into my small room. “Are you eating properly?” he asks, rubbing my arms on both sides.
I’m as honest as I can be. “I can’t seem to keep anything down.” My mouth twitches with a smile.
“Starving yourself isn’t going to help Cal. You have to fuel your body, otherwise, you just won’t function.”
“I’m well aware, but I can’t stomach anything right now.” My eyes fill with tears, “I just don’t know how to get over Ash, it’s so hard.”
“Come here,” he says, scooping me up once again. “I don’t understand why you’re apart in the first place. You two…” his voice fades.
“What?” I ask. “You two what?”
“You…you were always meant to be together and I hate how this whole thing is tearing you apart.”
His statement has me pulling back with a little anger. “Because he was unfaithful.”
“No Calla, he wasn’t. He didn’t sleep with anyone, there wasn’t even a kiss.”
“That’s not what it looked like to me.”
“He was well and truly set up. Ash told me what actually happened.”
“And you believe him?”
Scott raises his eyebrows and nods with just a hint of a smile.
