He wants an answer, and I’ve spent the last few hours and days going over this dilemma without reaching a conclusion. Until now. This could be my chance to be happy again. “You’re not wrong,” I reply, acting on that thought.
His shoulders relax and he breathes out a sigh of relief. “Thank fuck.” His lips twitch up at the sides.
There’s a long, silver chain around his neck along with an Aries pendant. It hangs between the opening of his shirt and the skin of his chest, causing me to close my eyes, block out the image of diving in lips first and licking my way from pendant to stomach and beyond.
“Angie?”
“Yes.” I jump a little, embarrassed again by my thoughts.
He takes my hand in his and runs his thumb back and forth across my hand. He causes my heartbeat to accelerate and there’s no way of disguising it as my chest heaves up and down. When he stares deep into my eyes and says, “You know I care about you so much and if your apprehension has anything to do with Scott, I want you to know I’d never do anything to disrespect his memory.”
I may just self-combust. He doesn’t need to tell me this. His sincerity shines through in everything he does. I reply with a breathy, “Yes, I know.”
He chews his bottom lip, shakes his head and with a slight crack in his voice, he says, “I can’t explain why this is happening, Angie, but there’s something inside me that wants you more now, than ever.” He swallows hard before he adds, “The voice in my head says we shouldn’t ruin what we have, but in honesty, just being your friend is not enough for me anymore. Is that wrong?” His beautiful eyes are pleading with me to reassure him. I wish I could, but I have to be sure.
When I met Scott, it took me a little time to give him a chance. He had to prove himself because of his chequered past, but as soon as I put my faith in him, I knew he was a good man. I never doubted his honesty and love for me. With Tommy, it’s different. We’ve been there before and when we finished the first time around, I promised myself I’d neverdate another musician. But then, Tommy is a different man nowadays. He’s honest, open, and an amazing father. More than that, he makes me feel alive again. My heart is saying yes; there’s room in here to love again. Then my head says,do not choose Tommy Graham. You’ve been there once. Don’t go there again.
With that thought, I wonder what the hell I’m doing? What if this whole thing with Tommy is more about flattery than feelings? What if I make a fool of myself over him.
I can’t risk it.
A snap decision clicks into place as I answer, “Friendship is the best I can offer you.”
His eyes widen. I think my answer has shocked him. He takes me in, his eyes searching mine, but eventually, he nods his acceptance. “I understand.” His mouth curves up on one side, but it’s not his killer smile. “I’ll see you soon.”
He kisses my cheek and the heat of his breath against my skin causes my pulse to race and an ache in my chest.
He looks back once before he leaves and I tell myself that this is for the best. But then, why is my stomach so sick at the thought of losing him? Why is there a need inside me to run after him and tell him I’ve made a horrible mistake. How long can I go on like this? My head is a total mess.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
TOMMY
My last attempt towin Angie over, failed. Now distance is the only way to change my mindset, and in time, I hope we can go back to being normal—whatever normal is. It won’t be easy. I can’t stop thinking about her.
I get that she might be confused and it was wrong of me to try and kiss her when she’s seeing someone. I don’t want to get in the way if Fraser is what she wants, but I don’t believe he is. There was something between us. I didn’t imagine it. I only wish she could accept it. On top of that, just the thought of her with another man is driving me crazy.
I’m trying to keep busy, but it’s a challenge. As a band, we’ve got a tonne of decisions to make, but it’s difficult while Ash is still away, and Max and I only jam when we feel like it. I hate to admit it, but I miss Brett.
One thing that is keeping me occupied is my kid. He still spends time with Josh, but when we’re on our own, we go to the beach, visit my parents, or play football. Our time together only strengthens my determination to seek full custody in the divorce. I love my kid and I want him with me permanently.
Today, I’m meeting an old university buddy, Alex Pine, for lunch. Now a big-shot divorce lawyer, he’s agreed to take on my case. He’s already sent out the initial paperwork to Chelsea, and we’re meeting for an update. Max is coming along for the ride. He hasn’t seen Alex in years.
The Black Pearl has always been our go-to restaurant and bar in Braebeach, although new owners took it over a few years back. It’s a little more upmarket than it was during our uni days and the perfect place to meet Alex. We should be able to talk without interruptions. Despite the low-key venue, it’s still a major operation for Ray and our security team. I want to drive my car, a classic 1970s Porsche 911 in Silver Metallic. She’s a beauty and less conspicuous than a cavalcade of Audis and Range Rovers with blacked-out windows. I finally convince Ray it’s a good idea, and he also agrees one security vehicle travelling behind us is likely to attract less attention. It’s still one more vehicle than I want, but he’s not budging.
We get inside the venue with little fuss and, although a few heads turn as we’re shown to our table, the overall atmosphere is pretty relaxed.
Times have changed for sure. As a student, Alex had the longest hair, the roughest, torn-up jeans, and he’d never go out without his standard Metallica t-shirt. Today he’s wearing a sharp blue suit, a white shirt, and a blue tie. The long hair is gone and now parted to one side and gelled within an inch of its life. You wouldn’t think it was the same guy. He stands with his hand held out to shake when we reach our table.
“Hey, man. It’s good to see you,” I say before bringing him in for a hug.
“Tommy, you’re looking great, mate,” he says, slapping my back. “Fame obviously suits you.” Then he turns to Max. “Long time no see, Max. My sister will flip when she findsout who I’m having lunch with.” He laughs. “You know she still hasn’t forgiven me for not setting you two up on a date.”
“Hey, I’m still single,” Max says, his arms wide open.
“Yeah, well she’s been divorced twice since those days. I’d steer clear if I were you.” Alex laughs.
We catch up with life while eating our lunch, but as soon as we’re done, we get down to business.
