She’d carried the words around with her like a stone in her pocket. Now it was early September. The leaves outside were starting to turn.
‘You’re doing it tonight?’ Callie said, zipping up her boots.
‘Yes.’
Callie looked at her.
‘Honestly. I swear.’
Callie kept looking at her.
‘Yeah, I know. But I’m doing it.’
Callie leaned to kiss Mae on the cheek. Mae turned her head and turned it into a deep smooch that made Mae want to undress Callie and pull her back into bed. She settled for getting her hands around Callie’s pert rear end.
‘Cheeky,’ Callie said as they parted.
Mae grinned at her. ‘Can’t help it.’
Callie sighed and went to the door. ‘Text me later,’ she said and sauntered out.
Mae let herself moan slightly at the thought of what she and Callie had been doing. But it wasn’t enough. It was never enough.
But if she could just have one horrible conversation, Callie would be all hers in a place they’d share. It was a high price to pay. But worth it.
***
She waited until they’d closed the following day. Until the last loaf was wrapped, the door locked, the lights off downstairs.
Her dad settled at the kitchen table with his notebook, as he always did. Numbers, deliveries, vague plans. He had his glasses on the end of his nose and a biro behind his ear.
Mae made tea. She watched the kettle, heart pounding, feeling ridiculous. Surely this was an inconvenience at worst and a minor disappointment at best? Not a betrayal. Please, God, not that.
He’d cope, she told herself. Callie was right. He loved her. He’d be upset, but he’d cope.
She set the mug down in front of him, sat opposite, and realised she hadn’t planned how to start.
‘Dad,’ she began.
‘Love,’ he said at the same time, then laughed. ‘Snap. You go.’
Her courage wobbled. This was it. No more excuses.
‘I need to talk to you about…’ She swallowed. ‘The future. About… me. And the shop.’
His expression changed, just a fraction. His eyes flicked to the ledger, then back.
‘Funny you should say that,’ he said, leaning back slightly. ‘I was just thinking we needed a talk. Can I… go first?’
The knot in her stomach tightened. ‘If it’s about the same thing, it might be easier if I—’
‘Please, love,’ he said, and there was something in his voice she couldn’t ignore. Something weary. Something that made the hairs on her arms stand up.
She nodded, throat suddenly dry. ‘All right.’
He took off his glasses and set them on the notebook. His hands were shaking very slightly.
‘I should’ve told you sooner,’ he said quietly. ‘I’ve been… putting it off. Didn’t want to worry you. Didn’t want to…’ He blew out a breath. ‘Anyway. No easy way to say it.’
