‘I’m sorry I forgot about our “getting to know each other” dinner last night,’ he said when he noticed her questioning eyebrow.
He didn’t exactly sound sorry though. In fact, from the tone of his voice she got the impression he was actually quite irritated about having to explain himself.
‘There’s a good chance I won’t be around at regular times in the evenings so don’t worry about making food for me. I’ll eat when I get in,’ he went on when she didn’t react right away.
So, she was going to be eating on her own every evening? How horrible. She hated the thought of sitting in this huge empty house all on her own, night after night, not having anyone to talk to. She was so used to being around people all day in the cafe and then chatting to her mum and sister over their family meals, it made her spirits sink to think she’d miss out on all that life while she was here.
For a whole year.
Her stomach knotted at the thought of it.
‘You know, this house is such a big, lonely place for one person. Perhaps your great-aunt wanted you to get married and raise a family here so you’re not on your own all the time,’ she muttered, unable to keep her agitated thoughts to herself any longer.
She saw his shoulders stiffen and the air felt suddenly leaden with tension.
‘Yes, well, she’ll have to be forever disappointed in me for not having children, I’m afraid,’ he said tersely.
‘You don’t want kids?’ She was surprised to hear that.
‘No.’
‘Why not?’
‘Because they’re an inconvenience. They mess up your life.’
The bluntness of his tone bothered her.
‘You really believe that?’
‘Yes.’
But she could have sworn she saw a hint of uncertainty in his eyes. Just for a second.
‘That’s sad.’
‘Sad? Why?’ He was scowling at her now as if she was talking utter nonsense.
She shrugged. ‘I don’t know. I guess I can imagine you being a great dad.’
He looked at her steadily for a couple more beats and she got the feeling he was trying to decide how to handle this without it turning into a big deal.
‘Well, thanks. But I don’t think I’m the sort of person who could give a kid the kind of love they need.’
‘Because your parents didn’t give it to you?’ she blurted without thinking, her frustration at his aloofness getting the better of her.
Exasperation flashed across his face, but he covered it quickly. ‘I’d rather not talk about my parents.’
‘Okay. Sorry.’ But she didn’t feel sorry, she felt annoyed with him for being so obstructive. Was he going to treat her like this for the entire year? Perhaps he’d hoped she’d squirrel away in her downstairs bedroom like an animal in a cage, never asking any awkward questions or getting in his way and only showing herself when he summoned her.
He must have seen the irritation on her face because he blinked in surprise. ‘Anyway, I have a lot to do this evening,’ he said, to her mounting ire. ‘I’ll leave you to it.’
Before she could utter another word, he strode out of the room, leaving her alone.
Again.
6
ARTICULATE – USE WORDS CLEVERLY TO FIGURE OUT WHAT YOUR PARTNER IS TRYING TO TELL YOU.
