“Mom, what the hell did you ever see in Frankie?” I’ve wondered about this for a year, and now she’s with someone like Rocco, who is Frankie’s polar opposite. I might disagree with how he just handledRyder, but he’s a great guy. I got to know him while Les was gone, and I can see where Ryder got his courage.
Mom stares off into space for so long that I don’t think she will answer. She finally turns sad eyes on me. “The Frankie you know isn’t the Frankie I knew.” She turns back to face the pool. “He was sweet, charismatic, and he set his sights on me the first time he stepped into town. He told me he was there to open a chain of hotels, which wasn’t a total lie. He didn’t tell me that he was married with children and the leader of a powerful crime family.” She finally looks at me again. “After I found out I was pregnant with you, his true colors came out. I was so blinded by my love for him I never saw how truly evil he was.” I grab her hand when her eyes start filling with tears. “He told me to get rid of you, and when I disagreed with that, he threatened to cut you out himself. I couldn’t have that, so I ran.”
“Mom, you don’t have to do this.” I didn’t realize how bad it was. I thought he had just paid her to go away.
“No. You need to know.” She swallows hard. “He found me when I was about seven months pregnant and had a new deal for me. He would pay me to disappear. Go back to my hole-in-the-wall town and never mention his name when it came to him being your father.” She grabs both my hands. “I never touched that money; I just wanted you to live. I wanted to live to raise you, so I took it and moved back to North Carolina. I never heard from him again.”
I pull her into a hug, both of us shaking with emotion. If I could kill Frankie all over again, I fucking would. Les took care of that for all of us, but Mom doesn’t need to know that. Mom doesn’t even know what Frankie did to Les.
“I’m proud of you, Leo,” Mom whispers. “You found an amazing girl and an amazing family.”
“I’m proud of you too, Mom,” I whisper. “For getting the fuck away from him.”
In the back of my head, I always thought my mom just wanted the money.
If Rocco is what Mom wants, I can deal with that.
Depending on how he deals with Ryder.
Chapter 19
Ryder
Idon’t know what I feel more. Hurt or pissed. I thought for sure Dad would have taken this in stride, just like he did when I told him about the relationship Les wanted. I was fucking wrong.
“You took care of that boy, Ryder. It’s some kind of hero worship. It won’t last,” Dad says, and it’s taking everything in me not to snap. “You can’t be anything but straight.”
“I can’t?” I grit out. “Well, I fucking am. I love Holden, Dad. It’s not a fucking phase, and it sure as hell won’t fucking pass.”
His eyes narrow. “Watch how you’re talking to me, boy.”
“No,” I stand up. “Fuck that. I’ve always respected you. Never speak out of turn. That’s done. You can either accept it or not. Either way, I’m with Holden, and you won’t change that.”
He stands up too. “I won’t accept what I know won’t fucking last,” he growls. “That boy is too weak to know what he wants.”
Before the last word is out of his mouth, the door swings open. Les storms in, slamming it behind her. “That’s enough,” she hisses. Damn, I missed her like this. Her shoulders are back, her blue eyes blazing. “Holden can hear every fucking word you’re saying. Keep your voice down.” She walks further into the room. “You know I respect you, Rocco, and you’re like a second dad to me, but I willnotstand around and let you belittle what Ryder and Holden havetogether.” She tucks her hand into mine, letting me know she has my back, just like she always does.
I look down at her and soak in the strength she’s lending to finally stand up to him. I love and respect the hell out of him, but never once have I stood up to him until now. “I love you, but you’re wrong about Holden. No one weak can go through what he’s been through and still have the heart to love the way that he does. You don’t get to talk about him like that.” Les squeezes my hand. “We’re going to go. You know where I am.”
I lead Les out of the room, leaving Dad staring at me. She pulls me around the corner into the bathroom, shutting the door behind us, knowing I’ll need a minute to get my shit together.
I jerk her into my chest, wrapping my arms around her body. Her hands slide up my back. “You can be whatever you want to be, Ryder,” she says against my chest. “Only an idiot can’t see what’s between you and Holden.”
“I know,” I mumble into her hair. “It just hurts because Dad has always supported me.”
She pulls back to see my face. “He still does. Do I agree with what he said? No. Was he shocked and reacted badly? Yes. Did I feel like I was going to shit myself when I walked into that room and stood up to him? Hell yes.”
That shocks a laugh out of me. “You’re not scared of my dad, are you,Il mio sole?”
She gives me a look like I’m an idiot. “Uh. Yeah.”
I laugh again and pull her back to my chest. Dad was around just as much as her dad. Les grew up like I did, feeling like they were larger than life. Now she’s in that position and still scared of him. I have to admit, so am I. Les always knows what to say and what to do when she can feel me reach my limit. The limit makes me want to punch something.
“I love you,” I tell her.
“I love you too.” I soak that in, ready to face everyone else.
“Let’s go home.”
