But why do I feel so lost now that they’re taking meaway from Zane?
“You will surrender to me, Precious,”Jay whispers as he thrusts inside me.
I shake my head because there is no fucking way. I try to sink into that headspace that takes me away from what’s happening, but it won’t come. He’s never done this to me before.
“Try to shut me out all you want. You. Are. Mine,” he growls in my ear, getting rougher, “They’re all dead. You have no one left but me.”
He moves to the side and points over his shoulder. I open my eyes and look, it’s like a magnet is dragging my eyes, and I can’t fight it. Zane is tied to the pole, but there’s a bullet hole between his eyes. His very dead eyes.
“NO!”I cry, trying to escape Jay, but he has all my limbs tied to the bed.
“You’re mine,” he repeats with a maniacal laugh. “You have no one.”
“NO! NO! NO!”
“…Les! Wake up!”
“You have no one,” Jay repeats, never slowing down. It hurts so bad; my heart is breaking into a million pieces. The loss of Zane is crushing me under its weight.
“Fuck. Baby girl! Wake up!”
Jay is shaking my shoulders now, trying to get me to stop crying. “They’re all dead.”
“NO!” I scream, sitting straight up, gasping for breath.
“It’s not real.” I jerk my head to that voice and look into Dex’s grey eyes. I launch myself into his arms, sobbing into his shirt. “It’s not real,” he repeats, running hands over my back.
My cries eventually turn into hiccups after what feels like forever; the whole time, Dex just offers his comfort.
When we finally got back to the house, well after four a.m., Doc patched up the rest of my wounds, checked my feet that Zane patched up, checked my scars, and looked at the one on my back. That’s when I discovered Jay carved his name into my back when he had me in that weird bedroom. I went through every emotion after that, and I shut down. I couldn’t take the torrent of emotions pouring through me anymore. I have numerous scars along with fresh wounds littering my body from where Jay would torture me, saying he was teaching me obedience. Doc took care of those and gave me several pills and different shots for anything he could thinkof. I wouldn’t let the guys into the room while Doc examined me because I didn’t want them to see me like this or hear what I needed to tell him. The most important question was Doc asking if Jay raped me. The answer to that was no. He said I didn’t deserve him until I fully submitted to him, but that didn’t stop him from touching me. After Doc was done, I showered until my skin was red and raw, put on the baggiest clothes I could find, and they were waiting right outside of the door when I was done. The last thing I remember is sitting in the living room and them telling me how long I’ve been gone and me telling them what happened. Most of it, anyway. I know I need to tell them, but I need time to process everything first.
I feel the bed dip behind me and look over my shoulder. Ryder spoons in behind me, squashing me between him and Dex. I finally let my muscles relax and sink into the bed against Dex’s chest.
“How long have I been asleep?” I ask, noticing the light outside.
“A couple of hours,” Ryder answers, scooting closer. “Nightmare?” he asks softly.
I nod my head, my eyes filling with tears. I can’t stop fucking crying. I’ve dug deep within myself, trying to find the ice queen the guys joke about, but she’s gone.
“We got you, Baby girl,” Dex rumbles, running his tattooed hand over my arm on his stomach.
“I missed you guys so damn much.” I missed all of them. I still can’t believe Gage is alive, and I keep expecting to wake up and find myself still in that room with Zane. The thought of Zane brings a wave of guilt because I miss him too, even though I’m surrounded by the guys I love. He’s the only person I had for six weeks, and even though he went through hell too, he stayed strong for me.
“We missed you too,” Ryder says brokenly. “We’re here now.”
“I know,” I whisper, grabbing his hand from my hip to pull it into mine on Dex’s stomach.
I cuddle closer between them and try to sleep, but every time I shut my eyes, I see Jay’s face or those masks the other guys were wearing. After the fifth time of trying, I sigh. There’s no way I can sleep right now.
“What’s the matter?” Dex asks after a minute.
“I can’t shut my eyes without seeing his face,” I answer honestly. I’ve already made up my mind that I’m not going to hide anything from them. I’ll eventually tell them everything that happened, but I can’t get my mouth to say the words.
“We’ll get this motherfucker,Il mio sole.”I know they will. They will bring down this whole city until they find him.
I give up on sleep and reluctantly sit up in bed. “I’m going to go downstairs.”
Dex sits up and kisses my forehead. “We’ll meet you down there.”
