“Nonsense,” Evander interrupts. “He would much rather see you than us.”
I shrug. “She is prettier,” I joke, trying to lighten the mood, and it’s my defense against what I’m really feeling.
Mateo chuckles. “He’s not wrong. Go on, Alessa.”
She smiles gratefully, following Doc out of the room. I need to see Leo for myself; I need to see his face to believe he’s okay. The moment I saw all the blood on his shirt, I knew he would die, and the overwhelming sadness that came with that surprised me. I can’t picture life now without Leo. I don’t know how to deal with those feelings. I came to terms with being in love with Les long ago, but I don’t know when I can tell her. Growing up, my only love was from Luca, Les, Ryder, and even Micah. My dad hated the very thought of me and told me every chance he got. I don’t know what love is, but I know I love Les. Do I love Leo? Or is it just because of what we did? I told him that I’m all in with him, but does that mean love? I shake my head, knowing now isn’t the time to examine those feelings.
Ryder stretches his legs out in front of him, his leg rubbing Holden's arm. Holden stiffens but shifts closer. I clamp my lips shut, so I don’t blurt out anything. I know I can make shit awkward with my comments. It isn’t in my nature to know when to shut the fuck up.
Ryder lays his arm on the back of the loveseat, laying his head back. “We’re going to war with the fucking Russians,” he says, coming to terms with it.
“Any way we can hide Leo and HoldenwithLes somewhere?” I ask jokingly, knowing the answer to that question. No way in hell Les will hide and let us take the heat.
Dex chuckles. “Keep dreaming. Did you see the look on her face earlier? She is more than pissed off. Viktor doesn’t know what he just did.”
He unlocked the killer that lurks just beneath the surface. The one that commands that she kill all the rapists, molesters, and woman beaters she can find, which she hasn’t done since we all started this weird relationship. It’s bound to come out now, ten-fold. I look at Dex, Ryder, and Holden and know they’re thinking the same thing.
“In short…he fucked up,” Ryder replies, lifting his head. “Queen Poletti just took her throne.”
Les might have been running things for a few years, but she tends to fly under the radar unless she needs to remindsomeone that she’s the Boss. That’s what makes people think she’s weak. It doesn’t make her weak; it makes her fair to let people know the rules and let them live their lives. She doesn’t put people under her thumb; it’s what makes her the fucking Queen. The guys and I have already discussed that it will take something like this before she comes to terms with who she is now, and watching her declare war on Viktor, that time has come.
“We already agreed to back you no matter what,” Evander says. “Viktor fucking Orlov dies.”
“I’m already running a virus through his systems to let me in,” Holden says quietly.
Ryder looks down at him. “That’s my boy.”
Holdens face goes beet red. That’s what Ryder said to him the other day with the same reaction that made me start questioning everything. Does Ryder know that means more to Holden than just praise?
“He’s asleep, but he’s going to be fine,” Les announces, walking into the room, collapsing on the couch between Ryder and me, giggling. “He’s loopy as hell. He asked if I was an angel.”
“You are an angel,” Ryder says, running his fingers lovingly through her hair.
“Of death,” Les and I say at the same time, making everyone laugh but Ryder.
He flops his head back on the couch again. “I hate that shit.”
“Don’t worry. Leo hates it too,” I joke.
I was going to my room earlier when I heard a thump coming from Les’ room. Going in there, I never expected to find her in a heap on the floor, tears flowing down her face. I didn’t need to ask what she whispered to Leo downstairs; the relief on his face said it all. It doesn’t bother me, but it does make me question if she feels the same way about me or if she ever will.
“Are you sure we can’t get you something to wear?” Les asks Evander and Mateo. “You are more than welcome to stay here.”
Evander looks relieved. “Yeah. That’s fine.” He looks at Mateo and back to her. “You sure you don’t mind us staying?”
“Of course not,” she smiles softly. “He’s your brother.”
“Come on,” Ryder says, heaving himself off the couch like the night has aged him ten years. I think it’s aged us all. “I’ll find you something.”
He steps over Holden on the floor, and I can’t resist slapping his ass on the way by. I might not be sexually attracted to Ryder, but he has one of the nicest asses I’ve seen on a dude besides Leo. I narrowly miss his arm swinging back, trying to clock me in the face.
Les laughs at Ryder grumbling, walking out of the room, Evander and Mateo chuckling behind him. “One of these days, his fist is going to connect.”
I shrug. “It won’t be the first time he’s punched me in the face.”
Holden slides onto the couch, stealing Ryder’s spot. “He almost knocked you out last time.”
“He broke your nose once,” Les adds.
