“I don’t think you do.”
She pressed her lips together to keep her chin from trembling.He didn’t wanther,Madelaine Alexander from a small farming town in Wisconsin.He wanted Madelaine, the Countess of Flandres.
“When you look at me, Christien, what do you see?”
She’d purposely worded her question the same way the other Madelaine had to test him, to see if he really did know the details of her dreams.He flinched as if she’d slapped him and his face paled.He knew.More proof.It was as if the final puzzle piece fell into place.Her last question had been answered.No way could he have known about their conversation in her dream unless he truly was the knight in her dreams.She put her hand on the bedpost to steady her trembling legs.
The gown she’d discovered in his room, the details of dreams she’d never told him, the sword.The dreams themselves.Everything pointed to the same thing.
Christien took a step forward, his shock turning to concern.“Madelaine?”
“It’s true, isn’t it?”
His brows came together.“What’s true?”
She swallowed a lump in her throat, her mind moving so fast she couldn’t keep up with her thoughts.“You and I.We did know each other all those centuries ago.”
She clutched the post tighter as the world narrowed to Christien.Everything else became unfocused, unnecessary.
“Yes.”He watched her closely, a worried frown creasing his brow.
Ohmy God, oh my God, oh my God.This isn’t happening.For a brief moment she wished she’d never accepted Giselle’s job offer and never met Christien.But the thought quickly passed, leaving guilt in its place.Would she have wanted to live the rest of her life without knowing him?
No.Emphatically, definitely, absolutely no.He frustrated her and bewildered her, but deep in her heart she knew she’d been searching for him her entire life.Maybe even longer.
If God had given her a do-over, she would gladly do it all over.
“Do you…” She licked her lips.“Do you dream of her?”
A pained look crossed his face.“Constantly.”
“When did you realize I was…” She couldn’t even finish the sentence because it was still so strange that she shared a past with another woman.But it wasn’t another woman, was it?It was her.
“Since the moment I saw that cretin pawing you on my dance floor.”His voice had a hard edge to it and his face became like stone.He’d been angry that night, but she’d assumed it was because the man was harassing a guest.
His reaction to her in his office made sense now, as well.He must have been reeling upon seeing her standing there.
“When did your dreams start?”she asked.
He approached her slowly until he was standing in front of her, a look of wonder and awe on his face.He’d had the same look the next day when she returned for the papers.He touched her cheek with the back of his hand.“You have always been in my mind, Madelaine.Always.”
She swallowed, her insides trembling at the fierce love glowing from his eyes.Yet she was still uncertain.Was his love for a woman he’d been dreaming of or for her?Was his offer to make love for Lainie or for a woman he’d never met in this lifetime?
And what of her feelings?They were so intricately tied to the couple in her dreams she didn’t even know where her true feelings for Christien began and where her feelings for the man in the dream ended.The two were the same, yet different.
He certainly looked like the Christien in her dreams and he acted like him, as well.But he wasn’t the same as the dark-haired knight.The man in her dreams had been filled with idealism and a hunger for adventure.He believed he was invincible and could save the world.
The man before her was cynical, weary, guarded.Lonely.
“When you look at me, do you see her?”she asked.“Or do you see me?”
“Don’t do this,ma chérie.”
“I have to,” she whispered.“I have to know.”
“Does it matter?”
Did it matter?She felt the same emotions Madelaine of Flandres felt.She lived Madelaine’s life, her terror, her joy when Christien appeared and her anger at the circumstances beyond her control.Like the two Christiens, the two Madelaines were the same, yet different.Lainie had been forged in modern times, taught to fend for herself, to fight for what was right.Madelaine was a victim of the brutal times she lived in and those circumstances made them vastly different people.
