’Tis only Christien.She knew he was trying to educate her.To arm her with knowledge to better protect herself, but the attack was so unexpected, she panicked.
“I am trying to teach you to defend yourself, Madelaine,” he said softly, as if realizing he had pushed her to the very edge of her endurance.
“What will that get me?”she asked.“I fight back.He fights harder.He’s stronger than I, and if my husband were to discover I can fight back, he will be furious.”
Christien blew a breath out between his teeth.“You need to defend yourself.Or have you given up all hope?Have you resigned yourself to this…this abusive life?”
“I shoved Lucien once,” she said softly.“After he pushed me into a dark alcove and…” She turned her head away, her face heating in humiliation.“He touched me.”
Christien’s fingers curled around the hilt of his sword.“And what did he do when you pushed him?”
“I know not.”Her shoulders came up in a shrug.“I ran away.”
Christien lifted her chin gently.“Madelaine, this manenjoyshurting you.’Tis obvious you fear him.Men like Lucien, and even your husband, feed on that fear.If you fight back, mayhap he’ll leave you be.”
“And mayhap not.”
Christien’s hold on her chin turned into a caress, his rough fingers sliding along her skin in such a way that a shiver raced up her spine.She thought of the night in the garden when her husband was so close but Christien closer and of the feelings he’d awakened in her.Feelings she desperately wanted to experience again.
“Have you told your husband?”
She shook her head.“He would not believe me.He puts his trust in Lucien and would not like to know his trust is misplaced.”
“Then he is a fool.Everyone makes mistakes.Especially when it comes to someone’s character.”
“Not my husband.”
“Most especially your husband.”Christien stepped back.“You must learn to fight Lucien.If you cannot avoid him, then you must fight him so he will never approach you again.”
“I try to stay away.I’m very vigilant.”
“What happened today?”
“I thought I was alone but he must have followed me.”Her gaze jumped to the bed and the clothes Lucien had thrown on the mattress.Her suppressed fear broke free.How had it come to this?Such a hopeless situation.Much like her life since coming here.
Lucien had carefully cultivated his reputation of a man in control of everything and with an answer to every question.To many of the men, including her husband, Lucien was all-knowing and all-seeing.He was the closest thing to God here.Lucien wouldn’t destroy everyone’s belief.He would keep quiet, but he would silently seethe and he would come back.
Fighting him wasn’t going to save her, merely delay the inevitable.She looked at Christien, at the hope in his face and remembered a time when she’d been as hopeful, before everything she believed in was destroyed.
“Let me help you,” he said softly.
She was so tired.So weary of her life.Danger lurked everywhere she turned—from her husband, from Lucien.Even Christien was a danger to her heart.And her love for him was a danger to her well-being if her husband were to discover them.And he would eventually.
“Madelaine?”He searched her eyes.His lips turned down.“What is wrong,mon couer?”
“Hold me,” she whispered, swaying beneath the gravity of her thoughts.
Christien pulled her to him in a tight hug.She melted into him, leaning her body against his, all of his dips and angles, the hard muscles and warmth fitting into hers.She closed her eyes and inhaled his scent.Man, horse, leather, sunshine.His rough tunic scratched her cheek and she rubbed her face against it.Christien’s hold suddenly became something more.Less exuberant, more tender.His arms cradled her instead of simply holding her, his hands moved slowly up her back, his fingers exploring.
“Madelaine,” he murmured, his voice husky.
“Mmm.”
She wrapped her arms around him, letting her hands explore as his did.His back was roped with tight muscles that flexed beneath her fingers.He was all sinew and strength.
She pressed her thighs to his, luxuriating in the strength of him.If she were strong like Christien she wouldn’t have to worry about fighting Lucien or her husband.
She tilted her head up to find Christien’s silver eyes looking down at her, sparking with longing and need.His lips parted, little puffs of breath fanning her cheek.She touched those lips with the tip of her finger, memorizing the softness.Her stomach clenched and a heaviness developed between her legs.A restlessness overtook her and she stood on tiptoe, pressing her lips to his.
