"I know." His arms tighten around me with desperate possession. "But you're dying without me, aren't you?"
The brutal truth of it makes me sob with frustration. "Yes. The seven women before me—they were all pregnant too, weren't they? All trying to channel fertility goddess powers while carrying children that demanded more than their bodies could give."
"Yes," he admits quietly. "But none of them achieved the divine enhancement you're channeling. Your power levels are unprecedented, Maya. You're not just a fertility goddess—you're something beyond what any of us thought possible."
"And that's killing me faster." I pull back to meet his eyes, seeing my own pain reflected in their golden-green depths. "I'm channeling divine essence at levels that should be impossible for mortal flesh. Without our mate bond to anchor it, the power is consuming me alive."
"The bond created by divine transformation isn't just emotional," he murmurs, one large hand stroking my hair with achingly gentle touches. "Your human physiology has been fundamentally altered to work in partnership with mine. Separation disrupts the biological processes your body now depends on for survival."
"So I can never leave you." The words taste like ash in my mouth. "No matter what you've done, no matter how Sarah betrayed me, I'm trapped by our bond."
"Maya—"
"Don't." I pull back fully, though staying in his arms is the only thing keeping the mate bond withdrawal at bay. "Don't try to comfort me or explain. Just... take me back to the Vine Court before this kills me and our baby."
"The dangerous period lasts through the entire pregnancy," he says quietly. "Your body is trying to channel unprecedented fertility goddess powers while growing our child. Both processes require my presence to remain stable."
"How long?" I ask, though I dread the answer.
"Until birth. Maybe longer, until we understand how your enhancement will stabilize afterward." His voice carries the weight of truth he's clearly been avoiding. "Maya, what you've become is beyond anything we've seen. The seven women who died—they achieved perhaps ten percent of the divine power you're channeling."
I stare at this man who has just admitted that I face months of potential death while carrying his child, that I've become something more dangerous and unprecedented than any fertility goddess before me. "And you think constant proximity will be enough?"
"I don't know," he says with devastating honesty. "But it's your only chance. Our child's only chance."
I think of Sarah's calculated betrayal, her years of secret monitoring and manipulation. I think of Thorian's lies about the memorial garden and the risks I was taking. Both of them viewing me as acceptable collateral for their larger goals.
But I also think of our child, moving restlessly in my belly, depending on my survival. And I think of the mate bond that's become as essential to my existence as breathing, regardless of how it was formed.
"I don't have a choice," I whisper, the words breaking my heart even as they acknowledge reality. "I can't survive without our mate bond until birth."
His relief is so profound I can feel it through our reconnecting bond, but underneath it, I sense something that might be genuine anguish. As if my forced return brings him pain rather than triumph.
"Maya, I need you to know—I'll do everything in my power to keep you safe through this pregnancy. Every moment, every day. I won't leave your side."
"Not now." I can't bear to hear explanations or justifications or declarations of love that might be real or might be manipulation. "Just take me back to your court and keep me alive long enough to give birth. But understand that I'm doing this to survive, not because I've forgiven anyone."
He nods slowly, and I see something that might be hope die in his ancient eyes.
As he helps me to my feet, preparing to carry me back to the Vine Court and the dangerous enhancement that represents both salvation and potential doom, I realize that love and hate might be more closely related than I ever imagined.
Because despite everything, despite all the lies and manipulation and betrayal from both him and Sarah, the thought of losing him forever hurts almost as much as the thought of dying.
CHAPTER 25
MAYA
The portal journeyfrom Greymont to the Vine Court passes in a haze of pain and barely contained divine power. Thorian carries me through the shimmering gateway with desperate care, his massive frame radiating the kind of protective fury that makes even ancient magic bend to his will.
Three days of bond withdrawal have left me hollow and burning, my enhanced biology consuming itself without the anchor of my mate's presence. The fertility goddess powers that should feel like flowing water now rage through my system like liquid fire, seeking the connection that will allow them to stabilize.
"Almost there, sweetheart," he murmurs against my hair as we emerge into the familiar warmth of his private chambers. "Almost home."
Home. The word should feel like mockery given everything I've learned about lies and manipulation, but my dying body doesn't care about betrayal. It only knows that proximity to my alpha is the difference between existence and extinction.
The baby kicks weakly in my swollen belly—four months along and already struggling to survive on maternal resources that are failing by the hour. Every flutter of movement sendslightning through my nervous system, divine power shorting out like overloaded electrical circuits.
"The bond degradation is severe," Lady Elvinia observes as she follows us into the chamber, her ethereal features tight with concern. "Three days of separation at this power level... My lord, we're very close to irreversible damage."
