“And you’re sure your knee is okay? No tightness or twinges?”
Brianna chewed on her lower lip as Chase continued to check out my leg, testing my reflexes. The movements were still a little stiffer than before my injury, but the doctors warned me that might happen. All that mattered was getting back out on the field.
Today was going to decide my fate, and I’d asked Brianna to come along for moral support. My girlfriend stood by my side, but her eyes never left Chase’s hands, trying to keep perfectly still as she watched him work. I reached out, taking her hand in mine.
“I’m good. Ready to get out there and play,” I said, speaking more to Brianna than my physical therapist.
Brianna smiled at me, but it was a little strained. She’d never said anything out loud, but her nervous energy spoke for itself. Watching me out on the field during practice was one thing, but if this session went well, this weekend, I’d step out onto the field for the first time in almost a year. After months of PT and strength training, all my doctors hadsigned off, and I just needed Chase’s approval before I could rejoin the team.
The last nine months had been both the best and worst of my life. Despite playing admirably, the Hawks lost the championship to the New York Rebels, my former team. The loss stung, but it also fueled us. The entire team worked hard during spring training and was ready to start the season. Me? I was even more determined to be there to help the Hawks take home the trophy.
This time last year, that would have been the end for me. Baseball had been my entire world, the one stable thing I’d built my life around. But now, despite my career being at a standstill, I wouldn’t change a single thing, not when Brianna was there with me every step of the way. After everything went down with her ex-husband, I'd asked her to move in with me. She immediately said yes, and we got to work transforming my home into one suited for both of us. The place looked completely different now, with homey touches, pieces of Brianna everywhere. We’d even turned one of the guest rooms into a library for all her books, and most nights when I trained late, I’d find her in there, curled up in an armchair with her e-reader clutched against her chest.
Even if I never walked back out onto that field, I’d be good. Our lives would be filled with more happiness than I ever dreamed about, but I wasn’t ready to let go of my dream just yet. If I could play, I wanted to. As much as I loved being with Brianna, I missed being a true part of my team. Even though I trained with them and attended almost every game, it wasn’t the same as being out on the field. I missed the rush, theadrenaline, that moment of perfect harmony when we all came together to make a play.
I wanted that. Craved that. And while most guys my age might head happily into retirement, it wasn’t the right move for me. Not yet, at least. I had one more championship left in me.
Now, hopefully, my body would cooperate.
Chase sighed, running his hand through his hair. “Looks pretty good to me. Can’t play the whole time, but you can get out there for a few innings as long as you promise not to push it too hard.”
I smirked at him. “That shouldn’t be a problem.”
Chase rolled his eyes. “You forget I’ve been with you since the beginning, Ramos. I've seen how hard you’ve worked to get back into the game.” He clapped his hand on my shoulder. “I’m signing off on you.”
“Really?”
“Yeah,” Chase said as he gathered his stuff. “Your knee looks good. No twinges, no pain. Seems like you’re good to go.”
“That means he can play?” Brianna asked, clasping my hand a little tighter.
“Yeah,” Chase said. “He’s ready. But don’t let him skip out on his exercises, Bri. Make sure he sticks with it, especially after a long game.”
She nodded. “Of course.”
I rolled my eyes. “Don’t let the doe eyes fool you, man. This one is worse than you. She had me running drills at five in the morning last week.” My eyes widened. “The sun wasn’t even up yet.”
“Knew I liked her for you.” Chase patted my shoulder as he headed toward the office, leaving us alone in the training room. Brianna rummaged through her bag, pullingout her car keys. Before she walked toward the door, I reached out and took her hand, pulling her to stand between my thighs. She ducked her chin, trying to avoid my eyes, but I refused to let her. “What’s on your mind, angel?”
She smiled at me. “That I’m so proud of you, my love.”
Her eyes glistened, and while I was sure that was true, something else lurked in the corners of her gaze. I brushed my thumb over her cheek. “And?”
Brianna sighed, running her fingers along the bridge of her nose. “Okay, I might be a little nervous about you playing again. Last year, when you got hurt…” Brianna trailed off, and I knew exactly what she was picturing. She sucked in a slow breath before reluctantly meeting my eyes. “I’m worried about you.”
“I’m nervous too, Bri.” I pulled her into my chest and kissed the top of her head. “But we can’t let fear hold us back, right?”
With a snort, she rolled her eyes, all too familiar with our mantra. After everything that had worked against us in the past, we’d agreed early in our relationship to be open about our fears and concerns. Some days, it was easier than others, but we learned to lean on each other during stressful times. Brianna helped me through my recovery, keeping track of my exercises and pushing me to keep going when I wanted to give up. She also loved to reward any progress with sexual favors, which helped with my motivation.
As for me, I’d been by Brianna’s side during the aftermath of her ex’s confrontation. While Brianna had decided against pressing charges, wanting to move on with her life, she did take out a restraining order against him. Toddcouldn’t come within a hundred yards of her, which seemed to work, because we hadn’t heard from the asshole since. Good thing too. I was still dying to get my hands on him after everything he’d done to Brianna.
Her family was another story. Some days, she struggled with keeping up her boundaries with her mother. While her brother, Jason, and his family were frequent guests in the Hawks’ outfield, Brianna had kept her distance from everyone else. They met up every few months, but their relationship wasn’t what it used to be.
It helped that our friends had taken the place of her family, providing us with unwavering support and love. Even though I was still on the reserve list, we had dinner every week with the team and often celebrated with them after big wins.
As Brianna studied my expression, she eventually nodded. “Can’t let it hold us back.” She reached out, playing with my baseball hat. It felt good to be in the Hawks’ colors again, to feel like more than a benchwarmer. The only thing better was having Brianna by my side every step of the way. “I love you, Damien.”
“Love you more, angel.” I leaned back and searched her expression. “What do you think about flying out with the team next week? Check out Vegas with me?”
