After that, everything moved quickly. I lay on the floor in a wide space, and Gaster quickly traced a complex-looking circle around me, before placing some gems around the perimeter of it. “This will help me keep the energy contained,” he said conversationally, his relaxed manner somewhat comforting.
When he was ready, he initiated the circle and I felt the energy close over the top of me. Almost immediately, Gaster started to chant, an icy bite of energy hitting my skin. It was sharp, cutting as it drove into my head, probing through the blocks that existed deep in my mind.
“This is not a spell like Mera’s.” Gaster’s voice was strained. “But it’s magic of some kind. More ancient than I’ve encountered before.” He paused for a beat. “And it’s fae in origin.”
Our theory of Tabby’s heritage was growing more plausible by the minute.
“I’m going to have to increase my power,” he warned me.
“Do it,” I grit out, ready to take my life back. “Go as far as you need—short of actually killing me.” The fear of my unknown memories had faded under the need to have more information to help Tabitha. With no one able to read her, my memories might be all we had.
There was another pause from the goblin. “I’m sorry in advance for what I’m about to do.”
Oh.Fuck.
The next cut was deeper, and I couldn’t prevent a whimper from escaping. “I’m going to need your power, Shadow,” Gaster bellowed. “This is ancient and deeply ingrained.”
Ancient?Why would my memories be suppressed by ancient energy?
The pain increased again, and as Shadow’s fire burned through the sharp cut of Gaster’s power, the scream I’d been containing burst free. I’d been doing so well keeping it inside, but now that my skin was being flayed from my body—at least, that’s how it felt—there was no more brave face. “You’ve got this, Sam,” Shadow rumbled.
Easy for that fucker to say.
The next scream was louder, and I sobbed through my pain, my wolf rising to shoot her own icy energy around, almost as if we were scrambling to find a tether to hold on to.
Shadow was saying something else, the tone vibrating through my body, but I couldn’t really “hear” in my current state. Though I was fairly sure that somewhere in his rumble were the words: I’m not sure she’ll survive.”
Great. Just fucking great.
11
SAMANTHA
Part of me wanted to pass out, but I also refused to on the chance my body decided to check out of this life. If I let myself fall into the darkness, maybe I wouldn’t be able to hold on as strongly—and I had to stay here for my daughter. No fucking way was I giving up one more second of time with her.
Shadow and Gaster were no longer visible to me. A sheen of white surrounded my body, and at some point I must have thrown up on myself; the scent of vomit permeated the air.
There was just so much pain. And burning. And screams.
When I’d almost exhausted my strength to hold on to consciousness, darkness hovering at the edge of my vision, I felt a brush of icy energy against my senses. It felt like my wolf, but a million times stronger. It washed across the pain, and my chest heaved as I sucked in air.
For the first time since this started, I was able to fill my lungs fully, and the urge to vomit again faded. I had no idea what or who was helping me, but I was beyond grateful for the mild reprieve.
Shadow’s voice cut through my cage, and I could make out his words clearly this time. “Len is here.”
Len was here?The fae friend who might be able to help with Tabitha? I was sure I’d met him before, or at least been in the same room, but I couldn’t recall anything about him. Was it his power that felt like an icy balm over my pain? Almost as if he’d inserted a barrier between me and Gaster’s hacking into my brain.
Speaking of…
“I cannot break her block,” the goblin said. “It would break her mind. We should wait for Len to physically arrive, since he’s apparently sent his energy through first.”
First.So it was his power protecting me from the pain. But why?
“Agreed.”
Shadow and Gaster withdrew their energy, and with it the ice faded. My chest grew tighter at the loss, and I tried not to mourn what wasn’t mine to keep.Len.The name continued to swirl in my mind, but I couldn’t place the face that went with it.
Even without a face, I’d know his energy and power anywhere now—the sanity I’d clung to in a sea of pain.
