"Baby is as active as ever.” She laughed and somehow groaned at the same time. “Kicking me with enough force to bruise some ribs."
"Sounds about right," I said with a chuckle. "It's a god baby, after all."
Mera groaned again. "Don't remind me. Shadow’s been trying to get me to leave all day, laying on the guilt." She lowered her voice dramatically. "They'll hurt you for the baby's powerandyou have another life to consider,in between him using his damn tongue as a weapon to cloud my mind."
"That also sounds about right," I said with another laugh. "Surprised he's let you out of arm's reach to sit here with me."
She wasn’t out of his sight, though; Shadow and Reece were on the top deck, cutting imposing figures across the darkening horizon. The friends were chatting, but it was clear where both their focuses were: right on this bench.
"He could be here in a heartbeat and we both know it, so I'm never really out of his arm's reach."
I turned back to Mera. "Doesn't that bother you?"
She shrugged. "You know, I thought it would, but I actually want to be with him all the time. He gets me, and I feel complete when he's nearby. In the end, Shadow can roar and throw fire and act like a possessive Neanderthal, but we all know I have the true power. He loves me, and I’ve never known another who’d work so hard to give me everything I’ve ever dreamed of or desired. What woman wouldn't want to be worshipped by a dangerously gorgeous asshole of a man?"
Her words twirled through my mind, round and round, filling every thought as I tried to understand. A few moons ago I would not have been able to at all, but now… maybe I did get it. "I never thought I could exist like that," I told her softly, my gaze finding Reece again for a beat, “but since my rebirth, there's a part of me that feels empty. A part that craves the connectedness I see between you and Shadow..."
"But the independence you’ve clung to for centuries rejects the idea, making you feel like you'd be weak to allow that into your life?" Mera took a fairly astute stab at the thoughts I hadn’t expressed. She pressed a hand to her chest. "I feel your battle here. In your energy. I know that you're dancing around something with Reece, and I'm here to tell you that it isn’t a weakness to give yourself to another. It's a strength to trust them in that way. It's a strength to follow the instincts of your body and not deny what it needs.” Her lips tilted into a smirk. “And it's definitely a strength to orgasm as many times as you did the other night and not have a heart attack."
I jerked as my wide eyes met hers, and she lost her shit, laughing so hard. “Oh my gods!” More laughter. “Come on, Angel. You completely forgot we were bonded, didn’t you.”
Shit. It wasn’t that I’d forgotten, but I had expected her to shield like I did. "You're not supposed to know. Our deal was very specific."
At this point it was lucky she was a goddess who didn’t really need oxygen to breathe because she was laughing too hard to take a breath. "Girl!” she gasped before shaking her head until eventually she calmed. “Did you really think I wouldn't feel it when you were in the midst of something so intense? Don't you feel Shadow and me?"
I was so used to blocking her now, and it had been my mistake to assume she was doing the same. "Not anymore," I said with a shake of my head. "I’ve trained my energy to block you the moment I feel your lust rising. It happens without thought now, so I don't catch the sexy times."
Mera pressed her lips tightly together. "You must block me a lot then."
"It's pretty much constant." My laughter finally spilled out as I leaned back into the wooden bench, feeling strangely more at peace now that Mera knew. "I don't even know how it happened," I murmured.
She snorted. “Well, when a warrior angel and a broody desert god are hot as fuck, sometimes they end up with the big coc—”
“Shut up,” I spluttered. “I knowhowthat part happened. What I meant was after all the centuries of anger and hate between us, it's odd that he's chosen now to claim me in the hope that we can quench the fire between us. Fires of hate as well as lust.”
Mera sobered, eyes darker than usual. “I was the catalyst, throwing you two together in a way you could no longer ignore. And once you open the gates, even if only a touch, the energy trickles through until it turns into a flood. You’ve just reached the point where neither of you can close the gates any longer.”
“You’re awfully intuitive for someone so young,” I said, reaching out to grasp her hand. “Guess it’s the old soul you possess.”
She gave my palm a tight squeeze. "It’s easy to look in from the outside. I’m not as close to this as you and Reece. I just think that you two insisted on ignoring the truth while you were super pissed at each other. The truth that, in the beginning, there was love. Reece is kidding himself if he thinks he can fuck you out of his system. You're both kidding yourselves."
Part of me hoped she was right, but I’d learned the hard way with Reece and hope. "I guess only time will tell," I conceded. "We're giving this a shot, and when the dust settles on this battle, we'll know the truth. We'll move on."
"Sure, sure,” Mera chided. “I’ll place a bet on thatnotbeing the case.”
I glared playfully, hoping she didn’t bet anything too important on this relationship. It had been days with barely any contact between Reece and me, and I sensed that he was preparing himself for our inevitable parting. I should be doing the same, only I couldn’t manage to distance myself like I had in the past. As Mera had said, the floodgates were open.
"Dinnertime!" Len shouted across the decks, and at that, Mera jumped to her feet.
"I'm freaking starving," she moaned, clutching her belly. The swollen section looked as if it was larger and hanging lower than it had been a few days ago, and as she hurried off, I hoped that I could be there when her baby arrived. I had never seen young born, and it felt like the sort of life-changing event I’d regret missing.
Especially since I’d never have it for myself.
I trailed Mera down the stairs into the main cabin, the guys leaving their stations to follow as well. We’d all gotten into a bit of a routine here, Reece steering, Alistair perched on the back deck communicating with the sand creatures while dousing himself in liquid, Galleli flying above when he could to scout ahead, and Len and Lucien moving back and forth across the main deck, clearly bored out of their minds.
Every dark-moon, though, we all ate together, family style.
Most of us were used to being alone for long periods, but this new tradition of eating at the long pamolsa-and-sand table was growing on all of us.
