I buried my face in my hands, trying to comprehend her limitless empathy and understanding. If only I could have been so kind to myself. “I should have been stronger,” I said, lifting my head again.
“Yes, you should have.”
We both jerked our heads toward the doorway to find Reece crowding the space, his face hard and unreadable. I was on my feet in an instant, fury and pain warring inside of me as I desperately wished I had the power to make him disappear. Forever.
“Screw you, Reece,” I rumbled, the vibration of my energy riding each word. “My power would have been lost, my family line gone, and I couldn’t... I couldn’t release them. Not when I knew that if you just kept fighting, you could beat them anyway.”
I’d calculated the odds of them winning and gone with my gut.
Reece seemed almost stunned as he remained there, blocking the doorway completely to prevent any other from entering. “You were guessing,” he finally said. “When you left, the battle could have gone either way.”
“No,” I shook my head. “I wouldn’t have left you if I’d thought you were truly in mortal danger. Despite everything, you can trust me on that. But the truth is, you asked for too much in my grief. You pushed me when I was fragile and broken; don’t be surprised that I shattered.”
This was the moment, a chance we could move forward. A chance for Reece to stop punishing me for one knee-jerk reaction a millennia ago.
He examined me closely, and I found myself holding my breath in anticipation of what he might say next. “You were my best friend,” he started, voice a low rumble, “the one I thought would stand by my side through everything. The way you stood by Mera. The way you sacrificed yourself for her.”
He finally moved, stepping into the room—into my personal space so he could crowd over me. “I’d thought there was nothing I could be angrier with you for than what happened in the Delfora long ago, but it turned out, there was. Our last battle.”
I blinked, confused by this rapid change of subject, and tried to read between the lines, as I often had to do with Reece. “You’re mad about the last battle too?”
He was close now as he reached out to touch my face, only I jerked away before he could. “You died,” he bit out, breaths harsh and broken. “You will never sacrifice yourself again.”
Hot energy seeped from him as rage coated the tented area, and I could taste his earthy power on my tongue. He was on the edge of losing control, and I had no idea how to bring him back.
“Reece.” This rumble came from Shadow, who must have come to check on us too. “Tell them what we learned and walk away.”
The desert god ignored him, his hyperfocus remaining on me. We’d broken the dam after all of these years, releasing the emotions, and now neither of us knew how to stuff them back in.
15
Eventually Reece regained his famous control and got to the point of his and Shadow’s return to the tent. “There’s a celebratory dinner tonight,” he said shortly. “We stopped by to give you the heads-up.”
He was now looking anywhere but at me, and in some ways that hurt more, reminding me of the years he’d cut me from his life.
“I don’t have anything fancy to wear,” Mera said, spinning to Shadow. “I mean, unless you can conjure up the magic wardrobe here?”
Mera could create her own clothing if she wanted, but from what I’d observed, they’d mutually agreed that the wardrobe was Shadow’s role.
“I can,” Shadow said with a slow smile. “But it’s not advised in the deserts. The energy here is unpredictable, and you never quite know what you’re going to create if you overuse magic.”
Like waking up some gods who were hellbent on destroying the worlds.
“It’s official dress anyway,” Reece said in his deep rumble. “I’m having outfits dropped off soon so that you can wear Rohami colors.”
Shadow crossed his arms, looking all broody and scary. “They will leave the clothes outside, so there’s no need to exit the tent until we return.”
“Yes, that’s right,” Reece said shortly. “They will not linger.” The heat grew around him as well, and now the tent was akin to a sauna. “We need to get back into the mix,” he said suddenly. “The unease in my energy grows stronger, and I think we should chat with the princeps of the Yemin dynasty. His response from before was definitely lacking some details.”
Shadow nodded. “Yes, and we also need to focus on Rohami. Your land is the most powerful… and the most power hungry.”
Reece didn’t deny the truth of this. Everyone familiar with the deserts was aware of the dominant traits of each dynasty. Rohami loved their power.
“Is everyone in this world long-lived?” Mera asked.
Reece’s smile was without the animosity he always directed my way. “We do have long lives by Earth standards. Many live the equivalent of a few hundred years, depending on how much energy they can absorb from the sands. But most are not eternal. Only a few of us with strong family lines can continue to refill the well of our lifeforce.”
Before she could ask another question, he turned toward the main doorway. “We really should go now; time is running out.”
