I expected a brush-off; Rafe wasn’t one for a touchy, “share your feelings” moment. But he surprised me.
“Yeah, I am. I haven’t seen my brother and sister for many months, and my parents are getting on in years. I like to see them as much as I can.” He was staring at his hands, a contemplative look on his face. “Once upon a time, my home was a prison. When that changed, all of us embraced a different view of everything. Now we hold on to what’s important with a ferocity that scares most people.”
He lifted his gaze, and I barely managed not to gasp at the intensity there. “Does it scare you?” he asked softly.
Jordan was silent in front of me, but he was watching this closely, without interrupting his best friend.
“You piss me off, Prince Rafe,” I said without hesitation, “but for the most part, I’m not scared of you. Not in the way you might expect, anyway.”
He was about to reply when the plane started to move, the pilot announcing some more shit about winds and distance and turbulence. I missed most of it over the pounding of my heart, so loud it was drowning out all other sound.
What was fucking happening here?
Was Rafe playing some sort of game? Was it just a competition with Jordan that had his attitude changing?
Did I even care what it was? Or should I just ride out this time in my life, enjoying the moments I had?
“Stop thinking so hard,” Jordan said with a laugh. “I promise, whatever is running through that beautiful head of yours, you definitely have it wrong.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “What makes you say that?”
His smile grew larger. “On instinct, you almost always expect the worst. You're realistic to the point of pessimism. And I get it, I really do; you were not raised to expect good things to happen to you. But this is not the same, Violet. It’s not.”
Dude already knew me better than he should.
“Time will prove it,” Rafe said suddenly from the side. “Only time will prove it for her, J. Let her have her thoughts.”
This one knew me as well, as if that didn’t pile more freak-out on top of my already healthy load.
I mean, I’d spent most of my life avoiding close relationships; even people I considered great friends like Meredith I’d always kept just on the outside of my deeper feelings. But these two, and Mattie and Nolan, they had all crept in.
They’d crept in without me even noticing, and now…
Now I had everything to lose.
Chapter 30
Ididn't use the fancy mask or the fancy face spray and creams, but I did end up agreeing to answer twenty questions with Jordan, much to everyone’s amusement.
“How many countries have you visited?”
I snorted. “Uh, two. New America and the Switzerlands.”
He winked. “Knew that, but I wanted to warm you up with an easy one.”
“How many have you visited?” I asked, returning his snort.
He had to think about it for a minute. “I think almost all of them. Lots of royal engagements growing up, especially in my younger years.”
“I can’t imagine it,” I said, shaking my head. I legitimately couldn’t. “We grew up worlds apart. How the hell am I even here now?”
“Not all of our worlds were that far apart,” Rafe said without inflection.
I nailed him with a stern look. “Are you going to explain that or just continue with your random cryptic statements?”
He tilted his head like he was considering it. “I think I’ll continue being cryptic,” he said decisively.
I fought the urge to punch and kiss him. I really wanted to do both.
