“I want you to lead them.”
She blinks at me. “I’m sorry, what?”
“Well, you’re already leading them, aren’t you?”
She rocks back on her chair, clearly shocked. “Yes, but… I’m… not good at it. Really not good. I’m tough on them and I curse and shout. A lot.”
“But you know what they need. You know how they think. I didn’t see a single fearful face out there today. They follow you out of loyalty, not fear.”
She splutters. “I don’t think you’ve thought this through, Marbella.”
I hide a smile as she takes up calling me by my name. I’m pretty sure it’s the shock of my announcement that makes her drop her guard.
She says, “I’m not going to bow and scrape like the other clan leaders. I won’t go easy on you.”
I laugh. “They don’t exactly bow and scrape either.”
“Hah. Grew backbones, did they? Let me guess… right after you killed Howl?”
I’m not sure what to say. The irony doesn’t escape me.
Indira blows a long breath through her lips. She reaches across the table for the cup she abandoned and inhales a long drink from it. As the mug thuds back to the table, she says, “Okay. But you need to know right away that I’m not letting those old bastards back on Mount Grievous. If any of them are still alive, you’ll have to find somewhere else for them to live.”
I ask, “Do you mean males like Gerst?”
“Exactly like Gerst.”
“He’s dead.”
“Good. I’m glad.” She stares at her hands. Her eyes water up, but this proud female will never cry in front of me. “Oh, fuck.” She hunches over her drink, shaking out her wings as if they’re dirty laundry. “How can I lead them when I can’t even fly?”
I’m not sure if I’m supposed to ask, but I’m going to anyway. “How did it happen?”
Instead of answering, she glances toward Erit, blinking hard to try to hide her emotions. “Erit can tell you.”
He shakes his head. He’s not going to go easy on her. “It’s not my story to tell.”
“Fine.” She gnaws at her lip. “It was the night Howl and I were sent out to kill shadow panthers. It was winter. Cold. But I had a plan and it worked. I killed my panther and started carrying it down the mountain before I froze to death. It turned out that my brother had a plan too. He jumped out at me… knocked me over, stabbed a knife through each of my wings to pin me to the ground, and took my panther. I couldn’t get the knives out.”
I peer at her. She said she’d made the cuts herself. “You ripped up your own wings to chase after him.”
“Coming back without a panther means death. So I tore through my wings to get free. He knocked me down again. Pinned me.Again.” She hunches even further. “Damn I hated my wings.”
“You ripped them again.”
“But this time he hit me with a rock. He knocked me out and left me there, bleeding. Right where the panthers would smell me.”
She clears her throat, squeezing her cup hard. “But I woke up to find Erit standing over me… and two dead panthers lying next to me. They would have killed me except for him…”
Erit interrupts her and she seems relieved not to have to keep telling the story. He folds his arms across his chest, muscles flexing. “I made you carry them both down the mountain.”
She growls, “While you vanished into the trees, you lazy brute.” Her eyelashes lower. So does her voice. “I always wondered how you knew I was in danger?”
Erit tips his chin at her. “Because you told me how you were going to kill the panther—trap it while you waited high in the trees, then drop onto its back and stab its eyes out. The panther Howl brought back was killed just like that, right down to the trap marks on its legs. I knew it was your kill, not his.”
She leans toward him, her expression softening. “You were gone three years later. What happened to you?”
“Howl was being groomed to take over as clan leader. I had to get out while I could.”
