Hanging up with Dawn, I couldn’t help but to laugh at our conversation. She was one of the most critical people that I knew. Although everything that she had said was a thousand percent true, I still couldn’t help but to feel annoyed becauseI was tired of constantly hearing what’s wrong with Justin as if I didn’t know already. Dawn and I were polar opposites. I’d just have to take what she said with a grain of salt and not get offended ‘cause she was straight up no chaser when it came to telling it like it was. Gathering my things then getting out of the car, I headed to the front entrance so that I could get my day started.
“Good morning, Ava! Don’t you look amazing this beautiful Thursday morning.”
“Thanks, Kevin, good morning to you as well. I actually feel amazing today. I was finally able to get some good sleep last night.”
“That’s a blessing. Glad you’re feeling better.”
“Me, too. Thanks again for looking out. I truly appreciate it. I’ll pay you back for the hotel room tomorrow when we get paid,” I said.
“I already told you not to worry bout it. You don’t have to pay me back for anything, it was no biggie.”
“I know, but you didn’t have to do that.”
“I know I didn’t, but I wanted to. Now, if you insist on repaying me, how ‘bout we do lunch or dinner… when you’re available of course. No pressure,” he said as he raised his hands in the air.
“Okay, got you.” I giggled. “I checked out of the room this morning, by the way.”
Kevin had insisted on putting the charges for the room I got at the Hilton on his credit card. When I checked in on Monday, he told me to stay for as long as I needed. I figured four days was plenty. I didn’t want to continue to rack up a bill on his card by staying any longer, so I checked out of the room before I came to work. I would’ve loved to stay longer, but I really needed to get back home and address my husband about what he’d done.
“Oh, yeah, so you’re going back to the house, huh? Are you ready for that?”
“I think that I am. Justin and I need to talk, and the sooner I can get this talk over with the better.”
“I can understand that. Well, if you need anything or need to talk, I’m ya boy.”
“Thanks so much for being such a sweet friend.”
Heading inside with a big smile on my face, I figured I should relish in the moment because later on today I had a feeling I wasn’t going to be smiling. I hadn’t been home since Monday morning, and I hadn’t talked to Justin since we got into it, so I knew Justin was going to be pissed off, but I honestly didn’t give a damn. For the first few days, I had my phone on Do Not Disturb, I needed to be to myself. The only person that I had spoken to was Dawn and that was because I wanted to give her a heads up about where I was in case Justin called her looking for me. She was so damn crazy if he called her and I went ghost she’d assume he did something to me and there was no telling what she would do or say if she ever felt like that. So it was a given that I had to tell her something.
I didn’t tell Shane what was going on because I didn’t have to worry about Justin reaching out to him. I knew that Justin didn’t particularly care for Shane, so that was the least of my worries.
The first couple of nights I didn’t feel like being bothered with anyone and it felt so emotional sitting in silence. But last night, I wanted to check in with Shane. I just couldn’t get ahold of him. I figured tonight would be a good night to go home because Justin worked Friday and Saturday. We’d talk tonight then I’d have the next two days to myself to figure out what my next move would be.
It was clear that Dawn wanted me to leave Justin, and in a way that was probably not a bad idea and for the best, but I loved my husband. I wanted to hear him out at the very least. Ineeded to know why he felt the need to be with another woman and why he felt that I wasn’t enough for him. I wanted to know where I was lacking in our relationship because I truly thought that things were going good with us.
As long as we’d been together and as much as we had gone through, I felt that I wasn’t wrong for feeling that way. I got what Dawn was saying and obviously it wouldn’t change what happened, but she didn’t understand what it was like to be in love and married, giving your all to a man and damn near loving him more than I loved myself. I needed an explanation or to see if he would be honest with me, so that I could have peace of mind with moving on. Making it to my office, I settled in ready for the day ahead.
“Knock, knock…” Kevin said as he entered my office. “I just came by to check on you before you left for the day. I wanted to see if you needed to talk before you went home and faced the devil.”
“Oh, wow! Not the devil, huh?” I cracked up laughing. “I’m good though. Thanks for checking in with me. I think I’m ready to hear what he has to say.”
“I’m glad you took my advice and gave yourself some time to think things through. You’re a very intelligent woman, Ava. I admire your strength and how you’re handling this whole situation.”
“Aww…thanks that’s really sweet of you to say. I wish my sister would understand as much as you do.”
“Cut her some slack. I’m sure your sister loves you and just wants the best for you just as I do. Seriously, I mean that. I ain’tgon’ lie though. I was pretty concerned about you on Monday. You were pretty hurt and upset, but seeing you hold your head up high and do what you needed to do for YOU over the past couple of days was pretty sexy to watch.”
“It wasn’t easy, and my feelings are still pretty hurt, but I’m much better than I was.”
“Take my number and if things don’t go as planned tonight, or if you need anything give me a call. I’ll make sure to be on stand-by.”
“Oh, Ion know, Kevin… I’m still married and?—”
“And what? You’re acting like I just asked you to be my lady or some shit. It’s strictly platonic. I know you’re still married, and I’m not trying to interfere with your marriage. I’m just trying to be your friend and be there for you is all,” Kevin responded as he wrote his number down on a sticky note that was on my desk. “I’ll leave the ball in your court. If you want to use my number, feel free. If not, no hard feelings.”
“I hear you. Thanks again for everything, Kevin.”
After Kevin left my office, I saved his number in my phone, then gathered my things so that I could head home. Now that I was going home, I couldn’t lie, my nerves were getting the best of me. I didn’t know why I was so nervous to talk to Justin, but I knew that I needed to get it over with. Plus, I was anxious to see what he had to say for himself.
