‘Oh, that’s much less impressive.’ One corner of his mouth lifted.
She cleared her throat. ‘But there’s a slight hiccup with the plan.’ She could feel Roul’s eyes on her.
‘Oh?’
This was it. The moment she would tell him of her dilemma and her solution. She would demonstrate that she was more than capable of managing the situation in his absence. That was what he needed from her, after all.
‘I’m pregnant,’ she said.
Roul did not move, did not speak, only stared.
‘I always thought it was something mothers told their daughters to keep them chaste. “It only takes one time.” But it turns out there might be some truth behind that warning.’ Her palms were sweating now, her entire body heating under the blanket. ‘And I know this is the last thing you want to hear before you leave, but I didn’t think it fair to hide it from you. I only found out yesterday when the physician was examining me.’ She swallowed. ‘I think the best part of the story is that Uncle Thomas was present for the entire thing.’
Roul was gripping one of his wrists so tightly his fingers had turned white. Since he was not speaking, she decided to continue.
‘Naturally, he wants me to get rid of the problem and try to salvage the plan.Hisplan. But I don’t want to do that. Despite our rather dire situation, I’m greedy for any part of you I can get.’ She licked her lips, surprised when she tasted tears. She brushed them away before continuing. ‘So, Harlan and Blake will say the baby is theirs. No one outside the family need know otherwise. I’ll get to be a part of his or her life, a big part. The main part. And one day, when our baby’s old enough to understand, I’ll tell them all about their amazing father and the sacrifices you made.’
Eda dragged her gaze from the water to look at him. He was staring down at the blanket where her stomach was hidden.
‘I know you’re probably expecting me to beg you to marry me and take me with you,’ she added. ‘But I won’t beg, because I already know your answer, and whether I like it or not, I understand your reasons. You want us somewhere safe.’ She was desperate for him to speak now. ‘Aren’t you going to say anything?’
His eyes travelled up to meet hers. ‘You’re… pregnant?’
At least he had retained the main point of her long speech. ‘Yes.’
‘Show me,’ he said, his voice choked.
She swallowed. ‘There’s not a lot to see yet.’
She opened the blanket and guided his hand to the beginnings of a bump. His whole body softened as his hand landed, his lungs expelling air. He tipped towards her until his lips pressed lightly on her shoulder. ‘Our baby.’
The warmth of his hand through her nightdress combined with the enormity of this moment had her trembling. He was not angry or disappointed. He was not pacing and tearing his hair out, trying to figure out a better plan than the one she had made. He was calm andhappy.
And now tears fell down her cheeks faster than she could brush them away.
It was the first time she had allowed herself to feel anything other than blind panic and guilt. The rest of the world could fade away for a minute while she sat with the tiny flutters that felt a lot like joy. For a brief moment, they were just a young couple in love expecting their first child. It did not matter that everyone else was stressed and devastated by the news.
When Roul finally raised his eyes, she saw they were shiny with tears.
‘I’ve got news too.’
The flutters stopped, replaced with dread. ‘If you tell me King Becket is beheading you in the square this afternoon, it’s going toreallyruin the moment.’
He reached up, running his thumb across her damp cheek. ‘I’m leaving soon to return to Carno.’
She had known it was coming, but the pain in her chest worsened anyway.
‘I’m going to pack up my family, and I’m going to bring them to Chadora.’
Her eyes moved between his as she tried to make sense of that information. ‘To… hang alongside you? What are you saying?’
Laughter filled his eyes.Laughter.‘Not to hang. To live here within these walls.’
She licked her lips. ‘Your family’s going to live here?’
He nodded.
‘Are… areyougoing to live here?’
