‘Doesn’t matter. We’re this side of the wall now. Nothing that happened out there changes anything in here. Am I wrong?’
She was still lost in all that had happened on the other side of that wall. ‘Astin…’
‘I’m not here to make more messes for you to clean up.’
She grabbed hold of his arm, forcing him to stop and look at her. ‘You’re not another mess. I just… I just need a moment to think, and you’re already shutting me out.’
He searched her eyes. ‘You don’t get both. You know that, right?’
‘I know.’ She swallowed hard. ‘I know that. Surely you understand that I’m in a position to help, so I feel morally obligated to do so.’
Astin scraped his teeth over his lip, nodding. ‘I understand.’ He was quiet a moment. ‘And hopefullyyouunderstand that if I remain your guard, I’m morally obligated to stand outside the king’s bedchamber every night while you fulfil other obligations.’
Tears gathered in her eyes, but she blinked them back. ‘Please don’t hate me. I can handle anything except for that.’
His expression softened. ‘I don’t hate you.’
‘Fletcher!’ The warden’s voice boomed across the open space.
Astin turned. ‘Yes, sir?’
Shapur looked between them. ‘Take Lady Lyndal to the terrace—now.’
Saluting, Astin watched him stride off before turning back to Lyndal. ‘Keep your cloak closed. Don’t let Queen Fayre see your nightdress.’
Chapter 26
Queen Fayre moved her castle along the chessboard, then looked up at Astin. ‘I believe the warden would like to speak with you in private, Fletcher. Lady Lyndal is quite safe here with me until Thornton arrives.’
She knows.Heat crawled up Lyndal’s neck at the realisation.
Astin bowed his head. ‘Your Majesty.’ His eyes met Lyndal’s as he turned away.
She fought the urge to stand and follow him out, instead trying to focus on the board. She could feel the queen mother’s eyes on her.
‘Loyal, skilled,andhandsome,’ Fayre said once Astin had exited the terrace. ‘Fletcher is quite the catch.’
Lyndal wiped her hands on her cloak and forced her eyes up. ‘He’s an excellent guard.’ She reached for her bishop.
‘Spectacular sunrise this morning.’ Fayre shifted one of her pawns. ‘I cannot remember the last time I saw colour like that in the sky. I imagine it was even better outside the wall.’
Lyndal held the tip of her bishop, trying to remember which way she was going to move it. Giving up, she let go. ‘I imagine it was spectacular from any viewing point. So much hope in just a few fleeting moments.’
Fayre was watching her, not the board. ‘It would certainly make a big difference if the sun was to return. Successful crops. Reduction in murrain and healthier livestock.’
‘And flowers.’ Lyndal moved her knight. ‘Which means the return of fruit.’
Fayre glanced at the board and slid her pawn forwards. ‘Check.’
Surprised, Lyndal studied the board, aware that her heart was beating so hard it was visible through her cloak. She moved her king out of danger.
‘If only that were the answer to all our problems,’ Fayre said, taking her next move. ‘But it is not that simple. Now is not the time for careless mistakes. You are playing the long game here. Get the crown, produce an heir, save the merchants from a lifetime of misery.’ She leaned back and looked at Lyndal. ‘Thenyou will be free to indulge. Take a lover, if that is your wish. So long as you are discreet.’
Lyndal tried to slow her breathing.
‘Please do not risk your safety and the future of this kingdom by messing with the order of things.’
What was she supposed to say in response to that?
