The guard looked between them, nodded, then headed for the gate.
Astin relaxed his grip when he realised he was still holding her at arm’s length. ‘Where’s your cloak?’
‘I didn’t bring one.’
He swore under his breath and turned her towards the castle. ‘Let’s go.’
Her chest felt like it might explode with all the things she wanted to say to him, with all the things shefeltfor him. She was undeserving of his devotion, of that she was sure. But she needed him to know he was utterly worthy of hers.
They walked in silence with space between them. They would already get in trouble if anyone saw them, so she did not want to make matters worse by clinging to him.
When they reached her door, she turned to him. ‘Come in?’
His expression was tortured. ‘That’s not a good idea.’
‘I know.’ She watched the indecision play out on his face, then slowly reached for his hand, pulling him across the forbidden threshold.
‘You changed your mind,’ he said once he was inside the room, repeating her words from earlier.
She nodded. ‘I changed my mind.’
He threaded his fingers through hers and brought the back of her hand to his mouth, kissing it. It felt like his lips had landed everywhere at once. Then his mouth was on hers, and she was pressing against him. She could not get close enough. Picking her up, he turned, pushing the door closed and pressing her back against it. She wrapped her legs around him, melting against the hard muscle beneath his uniform. His hand was between her head and the door—always the protector.
She felt hot and breathless as she tilted her hips up, seeking sensation.
‘Tell me if you want me to stop,’ he said into her mouth.
Was he insane? She responded by kissing him deeper.
‘Lyndal—’
‘Don’t,’ she breathed.
He groaned into her mouth, one hand venturing beneath her dress. ‘He’ll know.’
She gripped his face with both hands and looked into his eyes. ‘No he won’t, because he’ll never lay a hand on me.’ She could see he did not trust her, and she did not blame him.
He searched her eyes. ‘It’s going to be a mess.’
‘It’s already a mess.’ She kissed his stubbly cheek, then his other one, then his forehead, nose, chin. She kissed him until he believed her, until his mouth was on hers once more, even hungrier than before.
‘Get me out of this dress,’ she said, breaking their kiss. ‘I need your hands on me.’
He lifted her off the door and carried her to the bed. ‘You’re sure?’
‘I’m sure.’
Chapter 32
Astin peeled his eyes open as he registered a banging noise. He had fallen asleep. Lyndal stirred in his arms, one bare goddess leg draped over his and the rest of her tucked neatly against him. Light was now filtering in around the shutters, casting stripes of light over her.
‘Lyndal,’ he whispered. ‘Wake up.’
Her eyes blinked open, and the sweetest of smiles spread across her face. ‘Good morning, defender.’
As much as he wanted to lie there bathing in her smile, they needed to deal with whoever was standing outside in the corridor. ‘I need you to get up and answer the door.’ He kissed her rosy cheek. ‘And not look so pleased with yourself. Do you think you can do that?’
She startled when the knock sounded again, harder this time. ‘It’s probably Thornton.’
