It seems I’m not the only one who can’t sleep.
“Hey. You okay?”
She nods, but we both know she’s far from okay.
“Couldn’t sleep either?”
She shuffles over to the coffee machine. “Something like that.”
I sit quietly as she makes herself a drink, trying not to wrinkle my nose as the bitter smell of espresso fills the kitchen.
She takes a seat at the table. “I was up most of the night planning the funeral.”
I flinch.
I still can’t quite get over the fact that Max is gone and that I’ll never see him again.
“Oh, Mila.” I reach across the table to squeeze her hand.
Her face crumples as she fights to hold it together, but the tears start to fall anyway.
There are no words I can say that can take away her pain, but I hope that just being with her can bring her some comfort.
She pulls her hand free to wipe at her damp cheeks. “My parents want to keep it small. Immediate family only. It’s more private that way.”
“Of course.”
“Mom’s asking me about flowers and songs, but it all seems so irrelevant, you know?”
I nod as I quietly sip my tea, giving Mila the space to talk.
“She’s offering suggestions of songs by all these famous classical artists when I know Max would hate all of them. Knowing him, he would’ve probably wanted ‘Thunderstruck’by ACDC.”
I can’t help but snort into my tea. “It would be iconic.”
“Anyway, I suppose the funeral is just as much for Mom as it is for Max.”
“It’s forallof you.”
Mila bites her lower lip as she looks down at her coffee, a few stray tears sliding down her cheeks.
“If there’sanythingyou need…”
She gives me a tired smile that doesn’t reach her eyes. “Just being here is help enough. I don’t really want to be alone right now.”
“Well, you can stay as long as you need to. I mean it. Having you here… it’s helping me too.”
Mila and I stay at the kitchen table until the sun starts to come up, and I decide it’s time to take a shower and change into something that isn’t pajamas.
I take my time standing under the hot water, letting it loosen my tight muscles and bring some color back into my skin. I wash my hair twice and lather myself in more bubbles than necessary to try and wash away the phantom smell of rust and blood that still haunts me.
After my skin is bright red from the hot water, I shut it off and wrap myself in a towel before heading back into my bedroom just as my phone starts buzzing on the bed. I retrieved it from Ronan’s office in a rare moment when he was out.
I frown at the unknown number flashing on my screen, my stomach fluttering.
Could it be Max’s killer?
I stand frozen, staring at my phone, until the call ends. Only then do I release a breath and grab it off the bed just as a notification for a voicemail comes through.
